‘Alaskan Bush People’: ‘Faith & Family’ (RECAP)
In Discovery Channel’s Alaskan Bush People episode “Faith & Family” (June 21), the displaced Browns struggle through a devastating transition while Ami undergoes testing due to recent health concerns. Meanwhile, Browntown is under the care of a lone protector, as Noah braves the dangers of the wilderness to defend the homestead.
“Faith & Family” is the real season premiere, not like last week’s fake season premiere episode that got everyone all angried up. This recap is going to be a quickie (and late), because A) I’m on vacation, and B) this episode is 90 percent flashbacks, exterior shots and people just sitting around being worried or talking about being worried. If there’s anything worse than waiting waiting for your medical test results, it’s watching other people wait around for their medical test results on a cable TV show.
And now, to “Faith & Family.” (Yes, we have to.)
Ami’s in a lot of pain. Billy reassures Ami that the Good Lord will take care of them. He always has.
Billy likes to throw around “faith” and “family” and “the Good Lord” as a smokescreen for all the scammin’ and griftin’ and PFD fraudin’. He sounds like a politician on the campaign trail every time they interview him on camera. Billy says that they got through all their hardships — real or contrived — by trusting in faith, family and the Good Lord, failing to mention the Park Slope and Discovery Channel money has helped a great deal in leading the Faux Bush life.
And then we get a visit from our old friend, the Black Screen of Fake Doom.
The Browns, minus Noah and Bam, are in the Los Angeles area, and have been living there for months, according to Bear. Ami’s been through several rounds of doctor referrals, and now she’s going to UCLA Medical Center to have a biopsy on her lungs to screen for cancer.
But being AWESOME and EXXXXTREME must continue even in SoCal, so Bear rigs up a Bush fountain by overturning some patio furniture and stabbing a garden hose. Later in the episode, Bear brings Ami EXXXXTREME-squeezed fruit juice with her breakfast in bed. Bear picked some citrus fruits (or someone bought them at a nearby Ralph’s), hacked them with a machete, squished them in a garbage bag and watered it all down with the garden hose. I hope Ami gets to tell Bear that he’s her least favorite child before it’s too late.
The second-least-favorite child, Noah, is left behind in Alaska, pretending to protect and defend Brownton Abbey with his very life if need be. We find him walking around the property, poking a big revolver in every door just to make sure there are no bears or Taliban insurgents waiting in ambush. All clear. Noah can go about his daily douchebaggery.
Noah misses his beloved, Rhain, who appears in this episode only in flashback. We’re not told where she is, only that she couldn’t stay in Hoonah and that she’s not moved into Brownton Abbey. In the real world, Noah and Rhain were at an extended stay hotel in Juneau. They’re supposedly getting married in fantastic Dolores, Colo. “The idea is that eventually she wants a big banquet though at her dream house that I’m going to build her some day,” Noah says in barely intelligible English. Noah and Rhain creep me out. The more I think about it, they’re perfect for each other. I wish them a lifetime of weirdness together.
In the hour or so that Noah spent with the film crew in Brownton Abbey, he also blew a horn, pretended that his electrified fence works, made a jewelry box out of a clam shell and laundered his other shirt in a plastic tub that Kenny probably used to clean up after Sabrina. Back to Juneau with you, Noah.
Oh, look! Billy and Ami’s old friends, Bill and Margaret Fuller, have come to Los Angeles to show their support and be on TV again. “You know you’re always on our minds,” Bill says. But where is Cousin Cody? I’ll bet he thought he had more important things to do today. Heh.
The production crew is granted unusual access to the medical facility, and real hospital staff and physicians appear on camera. Usually when the Browns have a medical incident, all we get are a few exterior shots of them standing outside a hospital and someone sitting in a nondescript bedroom. Ami undergoes a procedure called bronchoscopy with transbronchial biopsy. It’s a long tube with a camera and tissue-collection tools that gets inserted down the trachea. We get to see more pictures from inside Ami than I ever cared to see.
Ami should have the lab results in a few business days, which means we get to see a lot more of nothing. We find the Browns trying to adapt their typical Bush act to Southern California. Bear explodes a laundry/dishwashing detergent pod with an EXXXXTREME! punch. Take that, stupid soap! Matt makes a lame archery set to shoot cardboard boxes at close range. Take that, stupid cardboard box! Birdy pesters a peacock, who wants nothing to do with her. Take that, stupid Birdy!
The peacock won’t talk to Birdy, so she settles on talking with Matt. They discuss the “C” word and the sudden realization that their mother is not invincible. Matt looks like hell.
I wish we could just skip to the part where Matt almost blows himself up.
It’s finally time to go for the test results. “I think [Ami] feels like almost all of us, let’s just get this done and get this over with,” says Billy. I say that every time I sit down to watch this show.
The previews of next week give us some idea of what the results are, and they are not good.
In case I needed to clarify my position on cancer: Cancer sucks. There’s nothing funny about cancer. Odds are pretty good that you’ve either fought the disease yourself, have a loved one fighting the disease, or lost someone close to you because of the disease. We’re not going to make light of Ami’s illness.
BUT … since this show has fabricated so much over the years, one can’t be blamed for sniffing something foul in the air produced by the noxious mix of the Browns, Park Slope and Discovery. Many commenters on Alaskan Bush People Exposed suspect that Ami’s not as sick as we’re being led to believe, and that this whole thing is being exploited for TV ratings. Even some diehard fans have stated that that if Ami’s illness is a ratings ploy, they’re done with this show forever.
This puts both ABP supporters and detractors in a weird spot. If the Good Lord or Park Slope miraculously cure Ami of late-stage lung cancer, then all suspicion of a ratings ploy will be warranted. And if Ami dies…well, that’s not good, either.
I’m rooting for Ratings Ploy. It might kill off this show for good.
Conversation44 Comments
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Comments are closed on this story.
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I know something they could have done while waiting on Ami's results: the grass at the house they were at needed cutting, Birdie could have gone to the dentist to see what could be done about her sideways front tooth, Matt and Bear needed a bath and someone needed to tell Rainy to put on more clothes. Noah could have started to clean up all the clutter and trash brought in to Browntown from the dump. They keep talking about how beautiful their land is and I am sure it was before Matt brought in tons of old tires for a HOUSE! Between Matt, Bear and Noah they have brought more crap home from the dump than Kenny can keep count of. I hope to God if they do leave Browntown that they leave it better than they found it! I feel so sorry for Birdie because she seems to be in Rainy's shadow. Gabe had braces put on his bottom teeth. Why can't they do something for Snowbird? I would love to see a makeover of Birdie.
Finally, I really hope Ami will be okay and I will be happy to pray for her and the family. I hope they can all find happiness in the future. I also hope somebody calls Kenny to come make a garbage pick up at Browntown! LOL
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Ryan, I don't know who you are, i just stumbled upon your commentary but can i get an Amen?!? So many levels of fakeness and anyone who feels the need to say "just don't watch" i don't really, my husband does so I am subject to it although always doing something else while it's on. This guy is spot on!
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Why, thank you, Lisa!
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All these episodes are damn flashbacks. It's getting EXXXTEMLY annoying.
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You're right Ryan...everyone has either dealt with cancer on a personal level, had a family member who battled it or knows someone who succumbed to it. It's nothing to joke about. That being said, no one can be blamed for having doubts as to the validity of this latest turn of events. I'd like nothing more than to hear that Ami is cured, or that it wasn't cancer after all. I may not hold the Brown's close to my heart, but I certainly don't wish them any harm. If, in fact, Ami does have late stage lung cancer, I will send up prayers to her & each & every one of her loved ones. Everybody deserves compassion & empathy when faced with such a tragic diagnosis. As far as the usual ridiculousness of Brownton Abbey and it's (former) inhabitants...well, it's just more of the same old same old lately. Bear is nothing short of an embarrassment...Noah doesn't have the brain God gave him (...or maybe he does...could've been an off day...), Matt looks like crap & obviously hasn't learned any lessons along the way, Rhain (Ruth) is as phony as they come (she fits right in, doesn't she?!), and I'm disgusted that Rain (the "real" one) is permitted to walk around looking like she's...never mind...I can't say it (but I'm sure everyone knows where I was going with that...). Bam is probably the only one with an ounce of sense in that he got out-a BrownTown & is living his own life now. I feel a pang of sympathy for Gabe & always have...he just seems "afraid" all the time. Seems as though he's waiting for a "go cut your own switch & meet me out behind the barn" ass whooping from Billy if he makes a mistake. Bird is getting weirder by the minute (and for Heaven's sake...you'd think by now she'd have had that fang fixed), and Billy is as useless and selfish as he's always been...leopards don't change their spots. EVERYTHING is about him losing his way of life...I guess I just expected more of a chivalrous attitude where Ami's situation is concerned. After all, when you love someone (as deeply as he says he loves Ami), aren't you supposed to care more about that person than you care about the turn your own life is taking? I don't know...maybe I'm just old fashioned. I'll be watching again this week, along with everyone else & hoping for some definitive answers...along with everyone else & and pointing out everything that's wrong...along with everyone else...! Until then...
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Well put, Steff!
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Yes. I agree. And that damn raindrop looks like a $5 whore. She is what 15 now,? Definetly will be on mtv 16 & pregnant in about a year. Little fast ass.
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I do hope this story line is exaggerated as no one wishes cancer on a person. The "kids" and Billy keeping up their acts does make it less believable. And, Mr. Berenz, it was as sensitive of recap as possible! Lastly, NOAH...WHY THE #×&$% SPURS??????
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Right on skiffy! Those bloody spurs make me wonder where the horses are, but then I realize there are no equine just a whole load of equine asses!
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I was thinking maybe they could get jobs while waiting----even temporary jobs---instead of making "fountains" or rope swings or bows and arrows....Everyone seems to be doing nothing....understandable re. Ami---and even Rain as she is still a minor----but the other adult children could try something constructive...
Sorry, Noah & Park Slope, but I don't believe for a second that Noah is defending Brown Town....and if that was really the Browns' plan while Ami was getting treatment...then it would have made a lot more sense for at least 2 of the Brown Boys to "defend" together. Not sure why Discovery is continuing the Brown Town fiction...no one can believe it...
I have to mention Bear's exxxxtreme orange/lemon juice-----really, Bear? You use your grubby hands, a grubby bucket, and water from the hose to make juice for your very ill mother? Gross. And, I suppose if Matt had made an actual working bow & arrow and bagged a squirrel, that he was going to fix that for Ami's breakfast, too....
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I want to know who the f is paying for all Amis treatment. Living in the "bush" its obvious they have no health insurance... so let me guess i am paying for thousands of dollars worth of treatment . Just great... The browns better pimp all their children out. Surely someone would have sex with those barnyard animals disgusting as kids
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Hilarious, educational and witty as always Ryan! Are Ralph's exclusive to the west coast? I only recognized Ralph's bc of when the dude bought some milk in a Ralph's with a check written for a dollar and some odd sense. Anyways, I digress, Noah needs to "eloquently" withdraw from Alaskan Bullshit People and start a new circus since Barnum and Bailey is retired. Billy really and truly is the most despised person I do believe I've ever had the displeasure of listening to. He makes my world of zen completely cluster******. Can't wait for the new episode tonight, it is tonight right?
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The Noah and Rhain Brown 2-Man Traveling Freak Sho...er...Circusaaa!
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Is this because you and he had a conversation. If you hate this show so much why waste your time watching?
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Ralph's is a real store! For years I thought Ralph's and In-N-Out Burger were just made up by the Dude. But they are very real, and In-N-Out is magnificent.
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I also agree with Bob AZ and Steff. Cancer is not to be joked about. I have also had this horrible disease take close family members of my family. If this turns out to be some thought up plot for their dumb-ass show, they should all be ashamed of themselves; EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. Ryan, your recaps are the only thing I stomach of the Brown Clowns show; can't even watch on DVR anymore. Your time reviewing this show is very much appreciated.
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Having lost a mom, dad, little sis, uncle and cousin to cancer, this show had better be more than a ratings ploy. If Ami has cancer, so be it. Life sucks. If not, then Discovery and Parkslope and the Brown Clowns should all rot in H*** for using the pretext of this disease to line their collective pockets.
Other than Noah wearing spurs the only thing I could glean from the show if the water tank (Desert Hot Springs. One of the 9 or so burgs that actually make up the Palm Springs area) was not a red herring, is that they are living in a riparian area in either the Santa Rosa or San Jacinto mountains just south of the Palm Springs area. That gives them about a 200 mile commute to Santa Monica. Why not stay in Santa Monica? That is a rhetorical question that only a fool would try to answer.
Ryan, the Brown Clowns as you emailed were probably in the Phoenix area due to three major cancer hospitals. Why they didn't choose one of them is anybody's guess but I have a pretty good guess why not.
Any clue as to why Bam ain't rallying around the family?
Back to the desert 🌵 I go to continue my wandering.
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So now that Ami is "sick", its appearently time to close down browntown for good.
Might as well, if they have to travel to the other end of the country for every doctors appoinment
This means that every episode, every season and every piece of bullshit has been utterly pointless.
Well its always been bullshit, but for all their talk about how browntown was all they ever dreamed of, they sure are reasy to shut the shit down double quick.
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I'm watching the "new" episode July 5th. It's all old flashbacks. I don't see how this show can continue with the Mother Ami this sick and the show no longer in Alaska.
The Browns should concentrate on doing what is needed for Ami and forget about a show. How can you call it Alaskan bush people when they no longer live in Alaska.
Flashbacks can not be every new show and it's not right to follow Ami's illness as she goes through treatment this should be kept in the family out of respect for there mother.
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I know right?! It's all stupid flashbacks. Is this show ever gonna go on? I thought it was funny how Rain is dressed and the highlights in her hair. She's fitting in, pretty well in L.A.
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I hit fast forward to get thru all the flashbacks to see them once was enough. I watched this show knowing most everything was fake I guess that was part of the fun. Growing up outdoors fishing and hunting every Brown hunt was laughable. But knowing there family situation and knowing there really not bush people the show is now pointless. Every week cannot be flashbacks or knowing this show it probably would be. Out of respect for mother Ami and the long hard battle ahead I think it's time for a long hiatus.
Maybe if all this turns out with a positive end for Ami a couple years from now they could return. Somehow I think Billy Brown would do everything he could to keep this show going no matter what condition his wife is in or where they live. I hope no I pray Ami makes it and lives to see a grandchild grow up as I would anyone battling this illness. I lost a sister years ago to this and I would not have wanted it broadcast on a weekly tv show.
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Billy's family was extremely wealthy and he was left the inheritance when they all died in a plane crash. Where did that money go to --- possibly DRUGS? Then he has to have the red cedar that two of his sons own to pay for the turbine. What a loser and lousy father Billy is.
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Damn straight Greg!
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Raindrop looks like a $3 whore.. She will give Ami that grandchild she is in desperately in need of im sure in about 7 monrhs from now. Billy has fingers crossed that its a boy so he can have Another slave worker for their cult
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Since this is a reality show not all of it can be real all the time, I don't know these people anymore than any of you do, I think I would like to try living like that, I might not last long, but that would be my problem wouldn' t it. I do know of Billy Browns past life and that is true, having been in Texas at the time he lost his family. Unless we all know what goes on in their lives, I think we all need to shut up since one member is very sick, and if they live by faith who are we to ? that, I live that way. How many of you do? Do you really?
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Billy has used his "faith" to build trust and then steal from churches and other people that have tried to help him and his neglected kids with mouths full of broken teeth,
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I hope it's just a ratings ploy! My mom died of small cell cancer within 4 weeks of them discovering she had it! Most aggressive cancer one can get! I love this show and hope to see all of them in the future! I hope it turns into a real reality show where they follow all the kids around in real life! Bam in New York and Noah in Alaska on and on! I don't know why they won't or don't take Birdie to the Dentist! Her teeth need fixed or no man or woman is going to want to marry her! Shame is is she is beautiful in her own way! I pray and pray Ami doesn't have stage 4 Cancer!
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"Welcome to the Bush"
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Matt is ALREADY stealing amis pain meds. Theu all moved and currenyly live in Colorado so matt can smoke weed lawfully...noah is p whipped besides his sister first time he had sex now wants to gey married. The nboys and billy will take turns with her because ami demands a grandchild no mattet who is the father. Bunch of sickos.
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Did you see this happen?
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Yes. My sources are very strong and reliable.
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it is legal in Alaska too CHief...
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voices?
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Is it really? Cause on Alaska state troopers they always are giving tickets out for weed.. i didn't know that
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This article is kind of harsh. But I can most definitely see why they did this episode. I am not sure why people would be angry over it. I lost my mom from cancer and this episode showed the worry and waiting you and your family goes through just WAITING while the tests are done. It showed the pain of not knowing. The what if's. It's a horrible time waiting for the final diagnosis. I am sure they have already been told it doesn't look good. But you have to wait for those final results from the biopsies and lab work. This episode walked people through that waiting process. Which is a horribly painful time. I think it's really mean to even THINK this is a ploy to get higher ratings. I understand they have done alot but I don't think they would stoop that low. You can see the pain they are going through during this time. It is written all over their faces. And to say you hope Ami gets to tell Bear he is her least favorite before it's "too late" turns my stomach. That sentence is the lowest of the low.
Yes sometimes their show can be repetitive. Yes they can be strange and different sometimes. Yes sometimes it is hard to watch. But have a heart. So what if Billy is using faith and family and the Good Lord so much! You would be surprised how many people turn to the faith when things are looking really Really grim! I hope and pray you never ever have to walk in the shoes where you or someone you know have cancer. It is a horrible horrible disease that turns peoples lives upside down forever. I don't feel like it is a ratings ploy at all but yes I would be done forever. But as someone who watched their mama die at a young age from cancer and my grandmother be diagnosed......I SEE the pain in their faces. The weight on their hearts. I see the weight of the world they are carrying on their shoulders.The worrying of not knowing and the what if's. That is something you CANNOT make up. Not even the best actor could show the pain they are feeling. Like I said. IF you have never walked the journey they are in right now you will NEVER know. But if you have you would know while watching the show that this isn't fake. This isn't a ploy. This is real. This is probably the REALIST thing from their show yet. Watching the pain of what they are going through and the journey took me through what we went through. So much so I was in tears with them.
I feel like your article is a joke of what this family is going through. I feel like it's poking fun of what every family who has experienced this has gone through. Cancer or the chance of it is nothing at all to joke about. A family taking us through the journey of a possible diagnosis of cancer is nothing to make fun of. I hope and pray Ami doesn't get a cancer diagnosis. But in my heart of hearts I have a feeling she will. And I feel like its going to be BAD as in late stage. My prayers go up for Ami and her family during this time. I have a feeling they are going to need each and everyone of our prayers.
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If "waiting"is swinging on a rope, making a fountain, digging holes and whatever else those idiots are doing while they wait, then I say you are spot on.
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When I was talking about the "waiting" for results I was talking about all of their tears and pain you could see on their faces. Like I said ....yes they can be strange, different and repetitive. Like so many people in this world! I know everyone handles stress and fear in all kinds of different ways. I have seen people get in fist fights when their families are dealing with illness. Some shut down. Some party hard to numb everything. Some swing from ropes, makes fountains, and dig holes. Everyone handles it differently. It can make people crazy!! So whatever helps them get through the waiting. Some people have their own specialness. Lol
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Maybe you all just should not watch the show.
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I agree. This article was very very rude and disrespectful on so many levels. Yes he put a "disclaimer" that cancer "sucks".... But I don't feel like his article made that heartfelt.
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If I cured cancer, would that convince you that I am strongly anti-cancer?
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Hmmm...perhaps you're right...and perhaps you shouldn't read the re-caps...
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Sounds like you may have to. How else can we know, if it's really heartfelt?? 😂🤡
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Perfect comeback. *anti Browntown fistbumb from Denmark* 😎🍺🇩🇰🥓
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