Stella: “You guys really have a thing about moving in with each other.”
Hermann: “Didn’t you ask Severide to move in with you?”
Stella: “That was...different.”
- Stella (Miranda Rae Mayo) bringing up something we’ve wondered about the whole Chicago Fire crew’s living habits.
Starz
American Gods
“It's like one of those good news/bad news jokes, isn't it? The good news is, we are lettin' you out early. The bad news is, your wife's dead.”
- A guard to Shadow Moon (Ricky Whittle) when he’s let out of prison.
Colleen Hayes/NBC
Great News
“This is Carol Wendelson we’re talking about. She knows everything about everyone. That’s why in high school they called her Deep Throat. Boy, I hope that’s why.”
- Katie (Briga Heelan) explaining to her boyfriend Trip (Tommy Dewey) why it will be hard to keep their relationship a secret from her mother.
Adam Rose/Netflix
Dear White People
Kelsey: “But after the the blackface party, I was so traumatized. I mean, racism here? I still can’t believe it.”
Joelle: “No one could have seen it coming.”
Reggie: “Yeah, I thought President Obama fixed all that.”
Kelsey: “I know!”
- Kelsey (Nia Jervier) explaining how she got a therapy dog after the blackface party.
Pawel Kaminski/Disney/ABC Home Entertainment and TV Distribution
Live with Kelly and Ryan
“It’s funny, because I sent a text to some of my close, close friends and co-workers. I said, “I’ve got great news!” Responses were this from people who know me well: “You’re engaged!” No. “You’re having a baby!” It’s not that. “You’re coming out of the closet!” I said, “How long have you known me?” “Six years.” So, it’s none of that - it’s this! And I couldn’t be more excited to be here with you every single day, and all of you as well.”
- Ryan Seacrest describing his friends’ thoughts as to what his surprise (a.k.a. co-hosting Live with Kelly and Ryan) might be.
Heidi Gutman/Bravo
The Real Housewives of New York City
“There’s guys you sleep with, and there’s guys you marry. Those are two different piles.”
- Sonja Morgan describing the two men she’s juggling—Rocco and a frenchman aptly nicknamed “Frenchie.”
HBO
Veep
Dan: “Who’s your favorite character on Downton?”
Amy: “I don’t know. Abbey, I guess.”
- Amy (Anna Chlumsky) and Dan (Reid Scott) talking about Downton Abbey after Amy’s press conference with fiancé Buddy Calhoun (Matt Oberg).