Best Lines on TV This Week (April 7-13): 'Say Nothing, You Understand? Get a Lawyer!'

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Better Call Saul - Bob Odenkirk
Michele K. Short/AMC/Sony Pictures Television

Better Call Saul

“Say nothing, you understand? Get a lawyer!”

-Saul (Bob Odenkirk) giving advice to a kid getting arrested in the mall during a flashforward.

Bates Motel - Vera Farmiga
James Dittiger / A&E

Bates Motel

“I know you think I’m a monster. I know you think there are people still fighting for good in this world, but honey—there is no good. It’s just life, which is hard, and cruel, and undeserving of your kind soul.”

-Norma (Vera Farmiga) to Norman (Freddie Highmore) after making him throw up his medication.

The Middle - CHARLIE MCDERMOTT, DANIELA BOBADILLA
ABC/Michael Ansell

The Middle

Lexi: “No, I get it. I’m just bummed. I’m with such a cute guy and I can’t tell anyone?”
Axl: ““Well, you can tell that guy.”
Lexi: “I like him. We like each other.”
Random guy: “Don’t care.”
Lexi: “That was not satisfying.”

-Lexi (Daniela Bobadilla) and Axl (Charlie McDermont) out on their secret date.

Survivor - Jeff Probst
Jeffrey Neira/CBS

Survivor

“We don’t need to vote. Just grab your torch.”

-Jeff Probst to Jeff Varner after one of the most emotional tribal councils in Survivor history.

Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Terry Crews, Chelsea Peretti
John P Fleenor/FOX

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Gina: “Yeah, I mean, I was legally dead for two full minutes. And I met God.”
Rosa: “Tight. What does she look like?”
Gina: “Ethnically ambiguous.”

-Gina (Chelsea Peretti) talking to the rest of the crew after returning to work following her bus accident.

Saturday Night Live - Louis C.K.
Will Heath/NBC

Saturday Night Live

“I’ve been doing this for 32 years now and it’s been going great for four years.”

-Louis C.K. after a (somewhat controversial) opening monologue on the late-night show.

Girls - Andrew Rannells
Craig Blankenhorn / HBO

Girls

“I just don’t understand why you would want to leave New York, okay? That’s like something your family makes you do when you’re too deep into crack to stop them. It’s not something that a young, vibrant, albeit pregnant, person does.”

-Elijah (Andrew Rannells) to Hannah (Lena Dunham) when Hannah drops the bombshell on him that she’s considering moving upstate for a job.

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