Best Lines of the Week (September 24-30): ‘I Know This Isn’t Your Fault, But I Do Not Like You’

Drew Tarver as Cary Dubek in The Other Two
HBO Max

This week’s television balanced out with a combination of monumental new moments and returning episodes of favorite shows.

The Tony Awards sparked excitement for a back-and-better-than-ever Broadway. Only Murders in the Building continued to make the list this week even though the episode was devoid of dialogue and The New York Times Presents: Controlling Britney Spears opened up our eyes to the years of harsh conservatorship the pop star has faced. Ted Lasso continues to demonstrate true camaraderie, Dancing With The Stars contestants sparkle onstage again, and The Other Two is still making us laugh.

Scroll down for the lines that stuck with us throughout the week.

Amanda Kloots and Alan Bernsten perform their foxtrot piece on Dancing with the Stars
ABC/Eric McCandless

Dancing With The Stars (ABC)

“I liked it so much, I wanted it to go on a bit longer if I’m honest. It was smooth. It was like butter on a hot muffin!”

– Judge Len Goodman in response to Amanda Kloots and Alan Bernsten’s timelessly sparkling foxtrot routine set to Kloots’ wedding song with late husband, Nick Cordero.

Lauren Patten accepts the award for Best Featured Actress in a Musical at the 74th Tony Awards
CBS

The Tony Awards Presents: Broadway’s Back! (CBS)

“I believe that the future for the change we need to see on Broadway comes from these kinds of conversations that are full of honesty and honest, empathy, and respect for our shared humanity”

– Lauren Patten (who plays Jo in Broadway’s “Jagged Little Pill”) references conversations with transgender and non-binary friends and colleagues during her Best Featured Actress in a Musical acceptance speech.

Amanda on The Great British Baking Show on Netflix
Netflix

The Great British Baking Show (Netflix)

“I’m going to throw all of the flour out of my house when I get home.”

– Contestant Amanda after placing at the bottom of the Malt Loaf technical challenge round due to a number of flour pockets within her cake.

Colin and fellow teammates in the locker room in Ted Lasso
Apple TV+

Ted Lasso (Apple TV+)

Dani: Where do you get dress shoes?

Colin: I don’t have time to stand in line at midnight and wait ‘till morning to buy new shoes.

Jamie: You don’t have to do that for shoes like these mate. Nobody wants them.

– The team discusses proper attire for Rebecca’s (Hannah Waddingham) father’s funeral.

Gabby and Justin on Fox's The Big Leap
FOX

The Big Leap (Fox)

“Skeletor just threw a chair at me. That’s totally going in the promo!”

– Justin (Raymond Cham) references uptight choreographer Monica’s (Mallory Jansen) outburst in rehearsal.

 

Jennifer Anniston as Alex in The Morning Show
Apple TV+

The Morning Show (Apple TV+)

Bradley: You were just trying to get me f*cking fired. Behind my back!

Alex: Well, I’m sorry I failed at that.

—Bradley (Reese Witherspoon) angrily confronts Alex (Jennifer Aniston), who’s returned back to The Morning Show after quitting.

Steve Martin as Charles in Only Murders in the Building
Hulu

Only Murders in the Building (Hulu)

“We did it!”

—Charles (Steve Martin) delivers the only line of dialogue in the entire 30-minute episode after finally getting into Tim Kono’s phone.

Felicia Culotta in Controlling Britney Spears Hulu
Hulu

The New York Times Presents (Hulu)

“Hang in there, your voice is coming back. You are louder and prouder and more powerful than I’ve seen you in a really long time.”

—Felicia Culotta, Britney Spears’ former assistant and friend, addresses the pop star with a hopeful message.

Drew Tarver as Cary Dubek in The Other Two
HBO Max

The Other Two (HBO Max)

“I know this isn’t your fault, but I do not like you.”

—Cary (Drew Tarver) storms off after a lawyer tells him about his viral nude photo is also Live with sound.

The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon
NBC

The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon (NBC)

“Amazing, who knew we could mix and match vaccines like tops and bottoms at old navy? So this means if you got Moderna you can get Pfizer, if you got Pfizer you can get Moderna, and if you got Johnson and Johnson then you should get both.”

Jimmy Fallon reacts to the CDC’s impending decision on mixing Covid-19 booster shots from different vaccines.