Best Lines of the Week (May 8-14): ‘And I Am At Your Mercy’

Best Lines of the Week (May 8-14), Featured Image
FX/Hulu; ABC/Raymond Liu; Courtesy of Netflix

This week on TV, we bid farewell to How to Get Away with Murder for good, as well as Outlander for the season. Drama boiled up on Survivor and Mrs. America, while the Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt interactive special and What We Do in the Shadows brought the laughs.

Heartwarming moments were had on Blindspot and Council of Dads. Plus, John Oliver gave us one of the funniest social distancing jokes yet!

Check out the gallery below for this week’s best lines on TV.

How to Get Away with Murder, Series Finale, Viola Davis, Annalise
ABC/Raymond Liu

How to Get Away with Murder (ABC)

“Who I am is a 53-year-old woman from Memphis, Tennessee, named Anna Mae Harkness. I’m ambitious, black, bisexual, angry, sad, strong, sensitive, scared, fierce, talented, exhausted. And I am at your mercy.”

 — Annalise (Viola Davis) gives a powerful closing argument at her trial during the How to Get Away with Murder series finale.

The Happy Days of Garry Marshall, ABC Special
Disney/Ron Batzdorff

The Happy Days of Gary Marshall (ABC)

“Garry is one of the greatest craftsmen of American culture that we’ve had.” 

Ashton Kutcher and many other celebrities remember Garry Marshall in a special on ABC.

Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt: Kimmy vs. The Reverend
Courtesy of Netflix

Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt: Kimmy vs. The Reverend (Netflix)

“These might as well be a clown in a sewer because they are IT.”

— Titus (Tituss Burgess) admires a bright pair of gas station reading glasses during one path in the choose-your-own-adventure special.

Mark Hamill as Jim the Vampire in What We Do In The Shadows - Season 2
Russ Martin/FX

What We Do in the Shadows (FX)

“After all the nonsense on Staten Island, I cut loose to Pennsylvania, because it sounded like Transylvania, and we all know that sounds cool.”

– Laszlo (Matt Berry) goes on the run from Jim the Vampire (Mark Hamill).

Mrs. America, Cate Blanchett

Mrs. America (FX on Hulu)

 “I’m glad it wasn’t a cherry pie because it would have stained my dress.”

– Phyllis Schlafly (Cate Blanchett) is cool in the face of a public pie-ing.

Survivor: Winners At War, Sarah

Survivor: Winners At War (CBS)

“If a woman lies, cheats, and steals in this game, they’re a liar or a bitch. If a guy does it, they’re a stud.” 

– Sarah makes a feminist statement at tribal council.

Last Week Tonight with John Oliver

Last Week Tonight with John Oliver (HBO)

“At this point, I have such severe quarantine brain that I could wake up in the Jurassic Period and my first thought would be, ‘Holy s***, those stegosauruses are standing way too close together!”

John Oliver makes a funny quarantine remark about social distancing.

Blindspot - Ashley Johnson as Patterson, Bill Nye as himself, Sullivan Stapleton as Kurt Weller
Barbara Nitke/Warner Brothers/NBC

Blindspot (NBC)

“Oh, no, no. One of the perks of being an internationally-renowned science guy is I know people that owe me favors. Plus, I’ve got some Bitcoin stashed away.”

Bill Nye returns as himself to help his daughter, Patterson (Ashley Johnson), disarm a bomb.

Outlander, Claire and Brianna

Outlander (Starz)

Claire: “I thought I’d never see you again.”

Brianna: “Shh, mum. I’m home.”

— Claire (Caitriona Balfe) returns home to find her daughter, Brianna (Sophie Skelton), after being kidnapped.

Council of Dads - Michael O'Neill as Larry Mills
Seth F. Johnson/NBC

Council of Dads (NBC)

Larry: “Well, sometime drinking makes you say stupid things or act in ways that aren’t nice.”

JJ: “So, you used to be a bully?”

Larry: “Yeah. I was a bully.”

— Larry (Michael O’Neill) comforts JJ (Blue Chapman) after he didn’t get invited to a party by telling him about his past.