‘The Bachelorette’ 2019 Episode 3: Honestly, Cam Should Probably Be Someone Else (RECAP)

Spoiler Alert

We’re already at Episode 3 of Hannah Brown‘s journey to find love on The Bachelorette and if things continue to move as quickly as they did in Episode 2 (I’m looking at you, Luke P.), then there’s a good chance Hannah will get married and conceive a baby by the time I’m done with this recap.

So, let’s dive right in and find out what happened on tonight’s episode…

Labor pains

Hannah invites John Paul Jones, Jed, Kevin, Tyler C., Matteo, Jonathan, Mike, and Always Be Cam on the group date where the boys learn about the female anatomy with a little help from Jason Biggs and Jenny Mollen. It seems like this may be a first-time lesson for some of these guys (hi Cam), and while I don’t think Hannah necessarily cares if they’re experts on placenta, they should probably know the basics.

Also, the guys get hooked up to labor pain simulators and this is just quality television.

Later in the evening, Jed gets some one-on-one time with Hannah and it’s really sweet. He tells her that their relationship is important to him and he wants it to continue to grow. Finally, someone who isn’t a stage-five clinger. They make a wish by throwing a chicken nugget (???) and I’m confused because I thought chicken nuggets were Cam’s thing. Whatever, Hannah clearly likes her nuggets so it’s all good.

Cam also gets some time with Hannah and reveals to her that he left his job to be on the show and acts like this is some huge deal. I mean, either you’re unemployed and you go on the show or you’re leaving your job and you go on the show. Why are you special, Cam? Stop it.

Mike gets emotional when he opens up to Hannah about a tragic story from his past. He reveals that he and his ex lost a child from a miscarriage and Hannah is touched by his vulnerability. Cam tries to interrupt Mike’s conversation even though they LITERALLY JUST SPOKE and Mike’s not having it. He sends him away but Cam, always being Cam, continues to come back. Maybe you should consider being someone else, Cam.

Hannah basically tells Cam to go away and she ends up giving the group date rose to Mike.

One-on-one date

So, Connor gets the one-on-one date and I honestly don’t even recognize this kid. After quickly checking The Bachelorette cast list, I realize he is, in fact, a contestant this season. Surprises all around. Anyway, this date doesn’t go as planned because Hannah goes to the hospital after passing out and is stuck in her hotel suite for the remainder of the day. Connor picks up soup and flowers (good boy) and spends some time in bed with Hannah. The guys back at the mansion talk about how great it would be to hang out with Hannah when she’s sick. Time to raise those standards, boys.

Connor’s date gets cut short because Hannah needs to sleep. Before he leaves, he hides post-it notes all over her hotel suite that list all of the things he loves about her. Not sure what he could possibly love at this point in the relationship but Luke P. has already lowered the bar so I’m not too fazed by this gesture.


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Later on, Hannah invites Connor back out to continue their date. They get a private concert from some random band (classic Bachelorette) and Connor gets the rose because he makes Hannah feel “so special.”

“I did catch the Hannah bug,” Connor says. “I’m a little sick with Hannah fever.”

The photoshoot

Peter, Luke P., Luke S., Joey, Garrett, Dylan, Devin, and Grant are invited on the second group date this week which is a photoshoot.

Hannah connects with Peter on this date and they share a kiss in front of the rest of the group. Luke P. admits that he’s frustrated that he has to share Hannah with all of the other guys and clearly he’s never seen an episode of The Bachelorette before.

Peter and Hannah.

Luke P. follows Hannah around like a puppy dog and even asks if he can come with her to her dressing room. The creep meter just went up about twenty notches and Hannah is officially annoyed. Finally.

Later that night, Hannah grabs Luke P. first and explains to him that he’s being too aggressive. Luke says the other guys don’t have what it takes to be her husband. Based on what exactly? Who the hell knows. Hannah explains that she’s irritated by his behavior and ends the conversation. You’d think Luke would back off at this point but come on, we should know better than that by now. Instead of laying low, Luke proceeds to interrupt nearly all of Hannah’s conversations for the remainder of the night. Talk about husband material!

Hannah ends up giving Peter the group date rose because he’s sweet and called her “Hannah Kelsey Brown” which means he knows her middle name and that’s like, pretty impressive for this show.

The tailgate

Instead of a cocktail party before the rose ceremony, they have a tailgate because Hannah is from Alabama and blah blah blah, we get it.

Cam announces to the group that he needs to speak to Hannah about something serious and asks for some privacy. In an act of desperation, Cam gives Hannah a sob story that consists of getting surgery on his leg, losing his grandmother, and also having to give away his puppy. Sad? Sure. Desperate? Yes. Is anyone buying this? Probably not.

Mike warns Hannah that Cam is just selling her a sob story in an attempt to get a pity rose. Hannah confronts Cam and he has trouble defending himself. Apparently he wrote letters to the other guys because he thought he was going home, so it’s clear his talk with Hannah was manipulative.

Who goes home?

Unfortunately, Always Be Cam’s pity rose sob story wasn’t enough to keep him around. Hannah sends ABC packing and we also say goodbye to Joey and Jonathan, who I’m certain will both be in Paradise.

The Bachelorette, Mondays, 8/7c, ABC