‘The Bachelorette’ 2019 Episode 2: Luke P.’s Feelings For Hannah Are Too Much (RECAP)
Episode 2 of The Bachelorette kicks off the very first dates of the 2019 season — meaning, the guys who are already falling in love with Hannah Brown despite only knowing her for 24 hours may finally get the chance to speak actual, big boy words to her.
Things are moving quickly over at the Bachelor mansion, so let’s dive right into what happened on tonight’s episode with this week’s recap…
Mr. Right Pageant
So, for the first group date, the guys are told they’re going to be competing for Hannah’s heart in a Mr. Right pageant and I’m officially confused because I was under the impression this entire show was a Mr. Right pageant, but I digress.
We have Grant, Luke S., Mike, Jed, Jonathan, John Paul Jones, Dylan, and Luke P. wearing speedos and riding unicycles because it’s 2019 and naturally that’s how Hannah is supposed to figure out who’s husband material.
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For the talent portion of the pageant, Luke P. realizes that he has no other talent outside of his rock-hard abs, so instead of doing some sort of trick, he admits to Hannah that he’s genuinely…starting…to fall…in love…and I’m genuinely…starting…to feel… uncomfortable.
It’s clear he’s read How to Win The Bachelorette or Die Trying: The Ultimate Guide to Earning the Final Rose cover to cover and knows exactly what he’s doing. (Note: That’s actually not a real book but like, Luke should consider writing it?)
Still, despite this cringeworthy, premature confession, the stage-five-clinger wins the Mr. Right pageant and puts an even bigger target on his perfectly sculpted back.
After the pageant, Hannah gets to spend some quality five-minute-intervals with the guys and ends up questioning Luke P. about his feelings. Apparently, he started falling in love with Hannah before he even met her and I can’t be the only one creeped out by this. Seriously Hannah, run.
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The One-on-One date
Tyler G. gets the first one-on-one date of the season and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have to look up who Tyler G. was. Apparently, he’s a psychology grad student from Boca Raton who got virtually zero screen time on night one.
Hannah takes Tyler on a day filled with helicopter riding and four-wheeling, and opens up about her awkward first date with Colton from last season. In a surprising turn of events, this date wasn’t awkward, and Tyler ends up getting the rose and a kiss.
“Today was the best first one-on-one I could’ve ever asked for,” Hannah says. Lucky for Tyler G., it’s the only first one-on-one date she’s going to have, so… claps for Tyler G.!
Roller Derby Drama
On the second group date, Hannah takes a group of guys — Tyler C., Joey, Connor J., Dustin, Garrett, Daron, Kevin, Devin, Matteo, and Peter — to the roller rink and apparently, none of these guys have ever put on a pair of roller skates before. What am I missing? Is the rink really slippery? Do their skates not fit? Have they never been to a party at Chuck E. Cheese’s before?
Meanwhile back at the mansion, Cam — being one of the few guys left without a date this week — occupies his time by playing the harmonica and speaking in the third person. Visibly distraught by not being asked out on a date, he takes matters into his own hands by crashing the group date with flowers for Hannah. Sorry Cam, that’s not how this works.
Tyler C., Kevin, and Garrett all confront Cam about his behavior but honestly, he’s just being Cam. He’s ALWAYS just being Cam. We can’t expect him to change.
“We all signed up for this knowing that it comes with the territory,” he says in his defense. Whatever you say, Cam.
The Cocktail Party
At the cocktail party, Cam uses chicken nuggets to lure Hannah away from Kevin and that’s a sentence I never thought I’d write. Kevin’s clearly pissed that Hannah chose a six-piece over him, so he retaliates by throwing a handful of chicken nuggets at Cam. Maturity for the win!
Things take a turn for the even-more-awkward when Hannah gets some one-on-one time with Luke P. and they start making out 50 Shades of Grey style. Hannah takes Luke’s shirt off right as Jed walks in and interrupts them. Jed races away as if he just walked in on his parents having sex.
Hannah feels guilty and chases after him to explain but like, maybe we save the shirtless moments for when you’re not at the cocktail party with 20 other dudes there? Just a thought?
Who Went Home?
It was a close call for Cam but he ends up getting the last rose. Sadly, we say goodbye to Connor J., Matthew, and Daron tonight.
After the rose ceremony wraps, Luke P., in true stalker fashion, sneaks into an interview room with Hannah and tells her yet again that he’s falling for her. She seems skeptical, but willing to ignore her gut instinct for the time being so she can see him take his shirt off a few more times.
The Bachelorette, Mondays, 8/7c, ABC