‘Succession’: All of the Best Lines From Season 3

Succession Season 3 best lines quotes
HBO

Succession delivered some more quotable dialogue in its third season at HBO.

Since its debut, the series following the Roy family has given viewers such gems as “you can’t make a Tomlette without breaking some Greggs” or patriarch Logan’s (Brian Cox) favorite phrase of “f**k off,” among many others. Season 3 has proven to be just as strong with familial tensions at an all-time high.

Below, we’re rounding up some of the best lines from Season 3 as we eagerly await the arrival of Season 4.

Succession, Season 4 Premiere, TBA, HBO

Succession Season 3 Nicholas Braun
HBO

Episode 1

“No comment.”

— Cousin Greg (Nicholas Braun) can’t seem to help but repeat the common phrase as he and Kendall (Jeremy Strong) are bombarded by reporters after the explosive Season 2 press conference. It isn’t necessarily the line that’s so funny, but the serious manner in which Greg delivers it.

Succession Season 3 Brian Cox as Logan Roy
HBO

Episode 1

“I’m gonna grind his f**kin’ bones to make my bread.”

— Logan tells Kendall’s assistant Jess (Juliana Canfield) over the phone. As far as threats go, Logan’s never seemed more menacing than after Kendall’s attempt to take him down.

Succession Season 3 Kieran Culkin
HBO

Episode 1

“Everything’s high risk if you’re a p***y.”

— Roman (Kieran Culkin) tells Shiv (Sarah Snook) when they discuss the risks Waystar faces following Kendall’s allegations against the company. While Logan wonders whether they should cooperate with the government, Shiv is reluctant to do anything but cooperate. Roman isn’t on the same page as his sister.

Succession Season 3 Nicholas Braun
HBO

Episode 1

“Good meme-age.”

— Greg tells Kendall when he asks about his current “cultural temperature” on social media. And although Greg does say “the negative stuff does tend to stick in the mind,” he boosts Kendall’s confidence with the “meme-age” mention.

Succession Season 3 Kendall Jeremy Strong
HBO

Episode 1

“This is like O.J. … I mean, except if O.J. never killed anyone.”

— Greg exclaims this upon learning that Kendall’s been denied access to the Waystar building.

“Who said I never killed anyone?”

— Kendall responds, hinting at his Season 1 car accident that left a civilian dead.

Succession Season 3 Brian Cox as Logan
HBO

Episode 1

“It’s war, f**k off!”

— Logan tells his Waystar team as they organize their defense against Kendall’s allegations.

Succession Season 3 Karl
HBO

Episode 1

“Karl, if your hands are clean, it’s only because your whorehouse also does manicures.”

— Logan tells Karl (David Rasche) after he suggests himself for the CEO position.

Succession Season 3 Jeremy Strong as Kendall
David M. Russell/HBO

Episode 1

“On a dumb level, I’d like my Twitter to be off the hook.”

— Kendall tells a pair of communication experts as he strategizes his next moves.

Succession Season 3 Kieran Culkin
HBO

Episode 1

“I’d lay you badly but I’d lay you gladly.”

— Roman tells Gerri (J. Smith-Cameron) as they wait for news regarding Waystar’s next CEO in a hotel room.

“Can I remind you Roman, that so far as I’m concerned, nothing has ever happened between us other than of a professional nature.”

— Gerri responds to Roman, setting her boundaries with the loose cannon COO.

Succession Season 3 Roman Kieran Culkin
HBO

Episode 1

“Your friend doesn’t like you boo-hoo, boo-hoo and dad wants to fire you woo-hoo, woo-hoo.”

—Roman sings to Shiv after learning that Gerri has been named Waystar’s sitting CEO after his sister missed out on securing Lisa Arthur (Sanaa Lathan) for their legal team.

Succession Season 3 Logan Roy
HBO

Episode 1

“We’ll f**kin’ beast ’em. We’ll go full f**king beast!”

— Logan shouts in exasperation as the brewing Roy family civil war begins.

Succession Season 3 Matthew Macfadyen
HBO

Episode 2

“Logan is gonna fire a million poisonous spiders down your dickey.”

— Tom (Matthew Macfadyen) says to Greg over the phone as he tries to ascertain where the nervous relative’s loyalties lay.

Succession - Season 3 - Sarah Snook
HBO

Episode 2

“There he is, the little man who started this big war.”

— Shiv says to Kendall upon coming face-to-face with her brother for the first time since he hurled allegations of wrongdoing towards their father and Waystar Royco.

Succession Season 3 Logan Roy Brian Cox
HBO

Episode 2

“The world is wobbling here. Does no one understand what the f**k is happening? I’m losing juice.”

— Logan yells at his team when they question what move he’d like to make next.

Succession Season 3 Roman Roy Kieran Culkin
HBO

Episode 2

“Oh, here he comes, the attention whore.”

— Roman to Kendall when he sees his brother for the first time since the big press conference.

Succession Season 3 Greg Nicholas Braun
HBO

Episode 2

“I just think if everyone’s showing up to battle in armor, then I feel kind of exposed here in my loincloth.”

— Greg tells his grandfather Ewan (James Cromwell) as he worries about getting the right legal counsel.

Succession Season 3 Kendall Roy Jeremy Strong
HBO

Episode 2

“I wanna offer you a ticket to the f**kin’ escape pod.”

— Kendall tells his siblings in hopes of swaying them to join his side of the brewing family battle.

Succession - Season 3 - Matthew Macfadyen
HBO

Episode 2

“But then, who ends up king potato?”

— Tom asks Shiv over the phone as she discusses the possibility of teaming up with her siblings to take Logan down.

Succession Season 3 Jeremy Strong as Kendall Roy
HBO

Episode 3

“I’m just really happy in my headspace, and I hope they’re happy in theirs.”

— Kendall tells a reporter over lunch regarding his relationship with his siblings.

Succession - Season 3 - Sarah Snook as Shiv Roy
HBO

Episode 3

“It’s a little, ‘we get it already, stop moaning about the rapes.'”

— Shiv trashing Hugo’s (Fisher Stevens) response to the company’s employees and their possible concerns regarding the ongoing chaos surrounding the allegations made by Kendall.

Succession Season 3 Nicholas Braun and Matthew Macfadyen as Greg and Tom
HBO

Episode 3

“You sold your ass for a watch?”

— Tom questions Greg after learning the reason he’s reluctant to use the Waystar lawyers because Kendall’s hooking him up with a cool watch.

Succession Season 3 Jeremy Strong as Kendall
HBO

Episode 3

“The game is ‘good tweet, bad tweet.'”

— Kendall announces to his fellow limo riders on his way to a gala, asking them to both praise and roast him at the same time.

Succession Season 3 Jeremy Strong as kendall
HBO

Episode 3

“I’m not a suicide bomber.”

— Kendall tells Shiv when she asks him to wait to raise chaos until their upcoming shareholders’ meeting.

Succession Season 3 Brian Cox as Logan Roy
HBO

Episode 3

“…health, safety, compliance, a few bad apples…”

— Logan tells Shiv about what might be in the papers Kendall is using as ammo against the company.

Succession - Season 3 - Kieran Culkin as Roman Roy
HBO

Episode 3

“Oh, f**k no, this will make him s**t his pop-tarts.”

— Roman’s response to hearing employee-submitted questions and his dad’s potential reaction to hearing them.

Succession Season 3 Brian Cox as Logan Roy
HBO

Episode 3

“Bring him up in the dumbwaiter like a f**kin’ hamburger.”

— Logan’s response to the news that Kendall’s coming into the office through the freight elevators.

Succession Season 3 Alan Ruck as Connor Roy
HBO

Episode 3

“I would like som suck-suck on my dicky dick.”

— Connor bluntly demands favors in return for Shiv’s attempt to get her brothers’ signature on a take-down letter against Kendall.

“Same, I’m feeling brutally unsucky-sucked.”

— Roman adds in, mirroring Connor’s metaphorical request.

Succession Season 3 Kendall, Jeremy strong
HBO

Episode 4

“Little Lord F**kleroy.”

— Kendall announcing himself over a conference call line with the team at Waystar Royco.

Succession Season 3 Kieran Culkin as Roman
HBO

Episode 4

“Wokeahontas? Using a poor’s forehead as a post-it, it’s f**king killer. “

— Roman tells Gerri about a potentially damaging story from his and Kendall’s youth which involved getting Kendall’s initials tattooed on a homeless man’s forehead.

Succession Season 3 Greg Nicholas Braun
HBO

Episode 4

“What’s it worth in terms of the me of it all?”

— Greg asks Logan what it’s worth to him if he were to join his side and get joint counsel under Waystar’s legal team.

Succession Season 3 Kendall
HBO

Episode 4

“Tell dad, meep meep.”

— Kendall tells Logan’s assistant over the phone as he explains why he started heading to Josh Aaronson’s (Adrien Brody) house early.

Succession Season 3 Adrien Brody as Josh Aaronson
HBO

Episode 4

“F**kin’ King Kong came out to dance for me. I’m honored.”

— Josh thanks Kendall and Logan for meeting him to talk business.

Succession Season 3 Matthew Macfadyen as Tom
HBO

Episode 4

“I got deep into the prison blogs about toilet wine.”

— Tom tells Shiv about the horrors that could await him during a potential prison stint.

Kieran Culkin as Roman in Succession - Season 4, Episode 4
HBO

Episode 4

“You tried to assassinate dad with the sun.”

— Roman accuses Kendall of trying to harm their dad after Logan suffers from a weak spell on Josh’s island.

Succession Season 3 Jeremy Strong as Kendall Roy
HBO

Episode 5

“There he is, the Panic Meister cooking up his sweaty spaghetti.”

— Kendall greets Frank over the phone as they discuss the shareholder meeting.

Succession Season 3 Kieran Culkin, Alan Ruck, and Sarah Snook
HBO

Episode 5

“So, the news is, tomorrow we’re all gonna try to look for jobs in the same branch of Target.”

— Roman updates his eldest brother Connor on the state of the Roy family and their precarious position with the shareholders.

Succession Season 3 Kieran Culkin as Roman Roy
HBO

Episode 5

“How do I know he’s not your meat puppet?”

— Roman asks Sandi (Hope Davis) about her father’s input and its validity considering his incapacitated state.

Succession Season 3 Nicholas Braun as Greg
HBO

Episode 5

“And just how bad will the burning be?”

— Greg asks Kendall after his cousin informs him that he could be used as bait if things at the shareholder meeting go south.

Succession Season 3 Arian Moayed as Stewy
HBO

Episode 5

“We are a complicated coalition and Sandy’s the angriest f**king vegetable.”

— Stewy (Arian Moayed) explains to Kendall when he calls to ask about the negotiations between Sandy and his family.

Succession Season 3 Kieran Culkin
HBO

Episode 5

“That is an imaginary cat. Now could you please f**k off?”

— Roman explains one of Logan’s UTI induced delusions to Kendall.

Succession Season 3 Sarah Snook as Shiv Roy
HBO

Episode 5

“I don’t want to be your f**king incubator.”

— Shiv tells Tom after he tries to convince her they should have a baby soon, especially if he ends up going to jail.

Succession Season 3 Matthew Macfadyen and Nicholas Braun as Tom and Greg
HBO

Episode 5

“You’re going to sue Greenpeace? I like your style, Greg.”

— Tom tells Greg after learning he plans to sue the charity in response to his grandfather reallocating his inheritance to the charity.

Succession - Season 3 Jeremy Strong as Kendall Roy
HBO

Episode 6

“So, you’re saying the papers are bulls**t?”

—Kendall asks Lisa, after he learns the case against Logan isn’t as strong as he once thought.

Nicholas Braun in Succession - Season 3, Episode 6
HBO

Episode 6

“Hey dude. Hope ur good. Just checking in. Any update on the burning?”

—a text from Greg to Kendall reads.

Succession Season 3 Matthew Macfadyen and Nicholas Braun
HBO

Episode 6

“Some Guy with an undercut just called me ‘soy boy.’”

—Cousin Greg says, observing the kind of demographic that’s attending the Future Freedom Summit.

“Oh, don’t worry, Greg. It’s a nice safe space where you don’t have to pretend to like Hamilton.”

—Tom tries reassuring his pal.

Succession Season 3 Kieran Culkin as Roman Roy
HBO

Episode 6

“Yeah, it’s like he’s a cartoon bear and there’s always a picnic hamper nearby.”

—Roman acknowledges Vice President Boyer’s (Reed Birney) habit of licking his lips.

Succession Season 3 Roman and Shiv
HBO

Episode 6

“Just wanted to let you know, new dad just dropped.”

—Roman calls to tell Kendall about their mother’s surprise engagement.

Succession - Season 3 - Sarah Snook as Shiv Roy
HBO

Episode 6

“Well, you’re tired. You’ll feel better about that in the morning.”

—Shiv tells Tom who continues to spiral about his prison fears.

Succession - Season 3 - Matthew Macfadyen as Tom
HBO

Episode 6

“Are you asking if you can hook your bauble of corporate wrongdoing on one of my branches, Greg?”

—Tom asks Greg who hopes his friend will take the fall for both of them so he can evade prison time.

“I just thought if it won’t make much difference to you…”

—Greg tries to justify his big ask.

Succession Season 3 Alan Ruck as Connor Roy
HBO

Episode 6

“I like Connor Roy.”

—Connor says to his family, noting his preference for presidential candidate option.

Succession - Season 3 - Sarah Snook as Shiv Roy
HBO

Episode 6

“Stop being a dirty, little pixie whispering swastikas in dad’s ear.”

—Shiv tells Roman to stop pushing to support a fascist-like presidential candidate.

Succession Season 3 Matthew Macfadyen as Tom
HBO

Episode 6

“I have of late decided not to tarry too much with hope.”

—Tom tells Kendall who is trying to persuade him to change sides in the Roy family fight.

Succession Season 3 Kieran Culkin, Sarah Snook, and Matthew Macfadyen
HBO

Episode 7

“She’s gonna give birth to dad’s baby while we chant a satanic mass.”

— Roman speculates about Logan’s possible affair with Kerry (Zoe Winters).

Succession Season 3 Matthew Macfadyen
HBO

Episode 7

“Apologies, Greg. I may have gotten a little carried away, but I just popped around to say, no one is going to jail.”

—Tom tells Greg after hearing that there will be no jail time for those involved with cruises.

Succession Season 3 Sarah Snook and Kieran Culkin
HBO

Episode 7

“Did you ask for mommy’s permission for the use of squatch?”

—Roman asks Kendall after he walks through a tunnel that’s meant to resemble their mother’s vagina.

Succession - Season 3 - Kieran Culkin
HBO

Episode 7

“We’ve got people in here picturing me jerking off. So, who’s the real winner?”

—Roman asks after seeing falsified headlines about his family in a display room at Kendall’s party.

Succession Season 3 Alan Ruck and Justine Lupe
HBO

Episode 7

“Oh man, what if McCartney tweets this?”

—Connor worries about the former Beatle seeing his embarrassing headline.

Succession Season 3 Jeremy Strong
HBO

Episode 7

“The Odin of codin’.”

—Kendall gives Lukas Matsson (Alexander Skarsgard) an interesting nickname.

Succession Season 3 Alexander Skarsgard
HBO

Episode 7

“Privacy, pussy, pasta.”

—A list of things Lukas claims he needs from Kendall’s party.

Succession Season 3 Jeremy Strong as Kendall
HBO

Episode 7

“It just feels like an a**hole’s party.”

—Kendall complains to his PR team after feeling the good vibes of his party beginning to dissipate.

Succession Season 3 Kieran Culkin as Roman Roy
HBO

Episode 7

“Dance of the sugar plumb failure.”

—Roman takes a stab at Shiv after her dance floor meltdown.

Succession Season 3 Stewy Arian Moayed
HBO

Episode 8

“Well, no, I mean if you jump out on someone on the road in the middle of the night, hit them on the head and shout, ‘I’m not ambushing you.’ It’s still a f**king ambush.”

—Stewy clarifies that Waystar’s secret acquisition of GoJo is seen as an ambush.

Succession Season 3 Gerri Roman
HBO

Episode 8

“Don’t open Pandora’s Box. There’s just more dicks in there.”

—Roman tells Gerri after she asks him to stop sending her “dick pics.”

Succession - Season 3 - Kieran Culkin and Harriet Walter
HBO

Episode 8

“So, what do you expect me to survive on? Macaroni and memorial services?”

—Caroline (Harriet Walter) asks Roman after he questions her choice to get married.

Succession Season 3 Greg, Shiv, and Tom
HBO

Episode 8

“Is there depth there?”

—Greg wonders if Comfry (Dasha Nekrasova) is his right match.

Succession Season 3 Connor Alan Ruck
HBO

Episode 8

“Will you make me the happiest man slash most bulletproof candidate in the world?”

—Connor proposes to a surprised Willa.

Succession Season 3 Harriet Walter Sarah Snook
HBO

Episode 8

“I should have had dogs.”

—Caroline tells Shiv, suggesting that she would have been better off not having children.

Succession, Season 3 - Logan Roy - Brian Cox
HBO

Episode 8

“Can we be civil and not pull our guts out all over the table?”

—Logan asks Kendall over a tense dinner.

Succession Season 3 Kendall Jeremy Strong
HBO

Episode 8

“I’m better than you. You’re, you know, I hate to say this because I love you, but you’re kind of evil.”

—Kendall tells Logan over dinner.

Succession Season 3 Sarah Snook Matthew MacFadyen
HBO

Episode 8

“Sometimes I think, should I maybe listen to the things you say directly in my face when we’re at our most intimate?”

—Tom wonders if he should take Shiv’s “I don’t love you” comment to heart or not.

Succession Season 3 Logan Roy Brian Cox
HBO

Episode 8

“Well, we do publish a number of popular newspapers, so yes, son. We probably invented the f**king words.”

—Logan confirming with Roman that he’s aware of what the term “dick pics” means.

Succession Season 3 Shiv Sarah Snook
HBO

Episode 9

“C’mon dick pickler, pay up.”

—Shiv tells Roman to pay rent in Monopoly, referring to his “dick pic” debacle with Gerri.

Succession - Season 3 - Brian Cox, Logan
HBO

Episode 9

“Let’s go see Hans Christian Anderf**k and see if he’s been telling us f**king fairytales.”

—Logan asks Roman to join him for a trip to see Lukas Matsson and discuss the potential Waystar-GoJo merger.

Succession - Season 3 - Kieran Culkin as Roman
HBO

Episode 9

“You’re kind of at the top of the pile. We’ll do me tomorrow.”

—Roman says in response to Kendall’s accusation that his siblings also need interventions.

Succession Season 3 Matthew Macfadyen
HBO

Episode 9

“If Roman marries her, he’ll invade France.”

—Tom warns Greg that he needs to make his moves with one of the royal guests at Caroline’s wedding or risk losing her to Roman.

Succession - Season 3 - Nicholas Braun as Greg
HBO

Episode 9

“I have a beef with GreenPeace.”

—Greg opens with an interesting conversation starter.

Succession Season 3 Kieran Culkin roman
HBO

Episode 9

“I’m not a f**k-o-meter.”

—Roman tells Shiv after she questions how many times their father swore during their meeting with Matsson.

Succession - Season 3 - Kieran Culkin as Roman Roy
HBO

Episode 9

“Leave me here with all the feelings, thank you.”

—Roman tells Shiv after she leaves him with a broken-down Kendall to take a phone call.

Succession Season 3 Nicholas Braun and Matthew Macfadyen
HBO

“Do you want to make a deal with the devil?

—Tom asks Greg, propositioning him for a vague business deal.

“What am I gonna do with a soul anyways? Souls are boring. Boo souls.”

—Greg eagerly goes all-in on Tom’s proposal.