Best Lines of the Week (April 10-16): ‘I’m the New Berlin Wall, Baby’

ABC/Craig Sjodin; Shane Harvey/The CW; NBC

This week on television, we got a brand new Bachelor spinoff with Listen to Your Heart, as well as a brand new spin on SNL with cast members taping sketches from home.

What We Do in The Shadows returned for a second season and Killing Eve for a third.

Elsewhere, late night hosts and their guests continued to crack wise about current events, Riverdale paid homage to Hedwig and the Angry Inch, and Netflix continued to fuel America’s Tiger King obsession.

Keep reading for a look at the best lines TV had to offer this week!

Margo Martindale on Mrs. America
Sabrina Lantos/FX

Mrs. America (FX on Hulu)

Reporter: Did you call the Speaker of the House a four-letter word?

Bella Abzug: No.

Reporter: Are you sure?

Bella Abzug: Yes, I’m sure. ‘Ass’ is a three-letter word.

– Legendary feminist politician Bella Abzug (Margo Martindale) has little patience — but excellent clapbacks — for reporters.

What We Do in The Shadows Mark Proksch

What We Do in the Shadows (FX)

“I’ve been experimenting with humor to drain energy. Which reminds me, does anyone here have any updog?”

– Energy vampire Colin Robinson (Mark Proksch) tries out intentionally infuriating jokes.

Corey Cott on 'Riverdale'
Shane Harvey/The CW

Riverdale (The CW)

“What’s up, Riverdale? Are you trying to tear me down? Well, sorry, I’m the new Berlin Wall, baby.”

– Kevin (Casey Cott) — and the rest of Riverdale — channels Hedwig and the Angry Inch.

Billy Eichner on 'Late Night With Seth Meyers'

Late Night With Seth Meyers (NBC)

“Here’s my biggest nightmare: imagine asking someone out when this is over, and they say, ‘No, I think I’m going to stay in.’ Then you know you’re a lost cause!”

Billy Eichner tells Seth Meyers his post-pandemic dating fears.

Jodie Comer as Villanelle toasting on 'Killing Eve'
Laura Radford/BBCAmerica/Sid Gentle

Killing Eve (BBC America)

“When we met, I’d just had a really bad breakup. But when I think about my ex today, I realize… I am so much happier now she’s dead.”

– Villanelle (Jodie Comer) tries to move on from Eve (Sandra Oh)… by getting married.

Kate McKinnon on 'Saturday Night Live'

Saturday Night Live (NBC)

“Today I’m going to be working all the major muscle groups of the body: the abs, gams, tuchus, chicken wings, and critical thinking.”

– Ruth Bader Ginsburg (Kate McKinnon) shares her at-home workout secrets.

Chris Harrison on 'The Bachelor Presents: Listen to Your Heart'
ABC/John Fleenor

The Bachelor Presents: Listen to Your Heart (ABC)

“I had never seen The Bachelor, but I recognize that guy. What’s his name, Chris– I almost said ‘Chris Hansen,’ but it’s not Chris Hansen. It’s Chris, uh… Hemsworth?”

– Contestant Matt blanks on remembering host Chris Harrison.

Tiger King Reunion: Netflix

Tiger King (Netflix)

“I have refrained from contacting [Joe Exotic], because he don’t know how to shut up.” 

– Zoo worker John Reinke discusses his relationship with the notorious former zoo owner on Joel McHale‘s post-show special episode, The Tiger King and I.

Sonja Morgan on 'The Real Housewives of New York City' - Season 12
Heidi Gutman/Bravo

The Real Housewives of New York City (Bravo)

“Just because we’re in a 39 million dollar house, you don’t have to act like a 39 million dollar bitch.”

– Sonja Morgan lashes out at Ramona Singer.

Rita Moreno in 'One Day at a Time'
Pop TV

One Day at a Time (Pop TV)

“I never saw the movie. I thought it was about a beautiful woman and her pet dog in a tuxedo.”

– Abuela (Rita Moreno) learns the plot of Beauty and the Beast.