Best Lines of the Week (July 1-7): ‘Never Change, Dustin Henderson’

Gaten Matarazzo as Dustin and Joseph Quinn as Eddie and in Stranger Things

Even the fireworks this weekend couldn’t distract us from our TV screens. This week’s shows gave us plenty to celebrate — and, in the case of the Stranger Things Season 4 finale, cry about — and naturally, they delivered some dazzling lines.

Only Murders in the Building delved further into the mystery of its strong sophomore season, with Episode 3 chronicling the last day of Bunny Folger’s (Jayne Houdyshell) life and making us sympathize with the crotchety building manager. Loot continued to bring the laughs with Maya Rudolph as a well-intentioned billionaire, and joining it is Hulu‘s Maggie, a new series that follows a psychic (Rebecca Rittenhouse) whose dating life is far from predictable.

Read on for the lines that popped from this week’s episodes.

Paul Reiser as the Legend in The Boys
Prime Video

The Boys (Prime Video)

“Between you and me, Soldier Boy did to singing what pantyhose did to finger-f**king.”

—The Legend (Paul Reiser) jokes to Hughie (Jack Quaid) after he asks what he’s watching; it’s an old music video of Soldier Boy’s (Jensen Ackles).

Jayne Houdyshell as Bunny in Only Murders in the Building

Only Murders in the Building (Hulu)

“And make me a promise. Don’t let yourself only love one thing. Because if you only love one thing and then one thing goes away, well… then you’re left with nothing. And that sucks.”

—Bunny Folger (Jayne Houdyshell), who is planning to retire to Florida, to her waiter Ivan (Ariel Shafir) after giving him an envelope of cash to buy DJ equipment

Joseph Quinn as Eddie and Gaten Matarazzo as Dustin in Stranger Things

Stranger Things (Netflix)

Eddie: “Never change, Dustin Henderson. Promise me?”

Dustin: “I wasn’t planning on it.”

Eddie: “Good.”

—Eddie Munson (Joseph Quinn) and Dustin (Gaten Matarazzo) as they prepare to fight the demobats in the Upside Down

Zenobia Shroff as Muneeba and Samina Ahmad as Sana in Ms. Marvel

Ms. Marvel (Disney+)

Muneeba: “This photograph, and those lights, how did that happen?”

Sana: “I don’t know, but I’d like to think two people fell in love and created something… something much bigger than either of them could have created alone.”

—Kamala’s mom (Zenobia Shroff) questions her daughter about her powers and how she acquired a photograph of her great-grandparents, but her grandmother (Samina Ahmad) answers.

Joey King as the Princess in Hulu's The Princess

The Princess (Hulu)

Merc: “F**k off. Do you even know how to use this thing?”

Princess: “Watch your language. You’re in the presence of a princess.”

— The Princess (Joey King) after shooting another merc with a crossbow

Constance Wu as Katie Buranek in The Terminal List
Prime Video

The Terminal List (Prime Video)

“I don’t criticize your work. I question your assignments.”

—Reporter Katie Buranek (Constance Wu) tries to convince Commander James Reece (Chris Pratt) to speak to her about his military op that went wrong.

Joel Kim Booster as Nicholas in Loot.
Apple TV+

Loot (Apple TV+)

“I did a little bit of acting when I first got here, but then I got this great job with Molly and I left it all behind, like a kid you leave in Target, OK? Of course I think about it sometimes, but I’m never going back there.”

—Nicholas (Joel Kim Booster) shuts down Howard (Ron Funchee), who is trying to convince him to take up acting again.

Alicia Vikander as Mira in Irma Vep

Irma Vep (HBO)

René: “Boys are scared of girls, so they fantasize about taming them. Of course, it never happens in real life.”

Mira: “Everything happens in real life. The good… the bad… everything in between.”

René (Vincent Macaigne) tries to explain his vision of a Les Vampires scene to Mira (Alicia Vikander) before they shoot it.

Tessa Thompson as Charlotte/Dolores in Westworld

Westworld (HBO)

What’s that you used to say? ‘Winning doesn’t mean anything unless someone loses.’ You’re just here… to be the loser.”

A version of Charlotte Hale (Tessa Thompson) with a copy of Delores’ mind after waking up human William (Ed Harris) from cryosleep

Rebecca Rittenhouse as Maggie in Hulu's Maggie

Maggie (Hulu)

“I’m not a relationship person. Yeah, I just don’t do it. Too hard when you can see how someone dies. Or how long their eyebrow hair gets before that happens.”

—Psychic Maggie (Rebecca Rittenhouse) to Ben (David Del Rio) when he flirts with her at a party as she’s working