Best Lines of the Week (April 27-May 3): ‘Are You Sober?’
Bob’s Burgers
Gene: “I can’t help until my hair is slightly more back to full hotness.”
– Gene (Eugene Mirman) refuses to help the family plan Bob’s surprise birthday party until he can fix his botched haircut.
Being Serena
Serena: “Just because I’m 36 and I have a baby, am I supposed to lower my expectations? That’s not something I’m used to doing.”
– Serena Williams opens up about having a child late in life in her new documentary.
Conan
Tracy: “Yeah, I sold crack. But I was a crack dealer with a heart of gold!”
– Tracy Morgan discusses his pre-fame life during his days of crack dealing.
Fear the Walking Dead
Al: “Because the truth matters. Even if it’s just heard out loud. Even if it’s just heard once.”
– Al (Maggie Grace) explains to the group why she collects the stories of those she meets.
Black Ink Crew
Sky: “If I wanted to be around people I’d watch porn. Those are my friends.”
– Sky Days is surprised and angered when friends show up to her house unannounced.
The 100
Octavia: “You are Wonkru, or you are the enemy of Wonkru. Choose.”
– With the bunker door sealed and the threat of starvation, Octavia (Marie Avgeropoulos) steps up as leader over all the clans.
Kevin Can Wait
Chale: “I thought your dream was to work in a drive-through restaurant that sells shepherd’s pie in a cup.”
Kevin: “That was my other dream.”
– Kevin (Kevin James) isn’t taken seriously when he announces he’s reuniting his former band.
Jersey Shore: Family Vacation
Pauly: “Right now I’m watching a horror movie. This is an absolute disaster. I need my popcorn for this.”
– Pauly D and Vinny sit back and enjoy the show when Ronnie and his baby mama get into a fight after fans see Ronnie exhibiting suspect behavior in a club.
Dancing with the Stars
Tonya: “I wasn’t allowed to compete, to perform in shows. You have people looking at you like you’re nothing, and then you start to believe that you are nothing. I just wanted to do what I was good at, and that was skating.”
– Tonya Harding opens up about being banned for life from U.S. figure skating before performing her first dance with partner Sasha Farber.
Vanderpump Rules
Lisa: “Are you sober?”
– When meeting Stassi’s boyfriend, Patrick, for the first time, Lisa notices Stassi is at a loss for words and questions how much Stassi has had to drink.
From the non-stop fun of Jersey Shore: Family Vacation, to the emotion filled episode of The 100, this week had entertainment for everyone.
Click through the gallery above to see our 10 favorite lines on TV this week!
