Best Lines on TV This Week: Cheerleader Truths on Modern Family, Geek Chic on Big Bang

Modern Family
Mitchell Haaseth/ABC
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Modern Family

“There is no such thing as a ‘born cheerleader.’ It takes hard work and sacrifice. You know what a human pyramid is without hours of training? Ten obituaries.”

–Phil (Ty Burrell) schools Claire (Julie Bowen) after she called him a “born cheerleader.”

The Walking Dead

“Simply put, there is a vast ocean of shit that you people don’t know shit about. Rick knows every fine grain of said shit. And then some.”

–During the season finale, Abraham (Michael Cudlitz) defends Rick’s (Andrew Lincoln) actions during a town meeting.

Mom

“You want me to disrobe?”

–Both Bonnie (Allison Janney) and Christy (Anna Faris) are flustered when a good-looking doctor comes in to check on Bonnie’s injured back.

The Big Bang Theory

Bernadette: “Leonard makes you watch that [Game of Thrones] too?
Penny: “No, no. I like that show. It’s got dragons and people doing it.”

– Penny (Kaley Cuoco-Sweeting) admits there’s some nerd culture she actually enjoys.

Ursula Coyote/AMC

Better Call Saul

“You’re Slippin’ Jimmy! Slippin’ Jimmy with a law degree is like a gorilla with a machine gun.”

–All the trust that Chuck (Michael McKean) once had for his brother Jimmy (Bob Odenkirk) is gone.

Younger

“First you think you’re looking at a giant furry penis and then it suddenly stands up and then you realize it is actually a golden retriever puppy.”

–Lauren (Molly Bernard) describes to Kelsey (Hilary Duff) and Liza (Sutton Foster) what she saw in a video for a new underwear line.

Comedy Central Roast of Justin Bieber

“Selena Gomez wanted to be here, but she’s dating men now.”

–Jeff Ross hits Justin Bieber with a ferocious diss.