Stephen Colbert Blasts ‘Toddler’ Trump & Mocks MAGA Voters in Tariff War Monologue

Stephen Colbert
The Late Show YouTube

Stephen Colbert slammed President Donald Trump‘s tariff agenda on Monday’s (February 3) episode of The Late Show, arguing that many MAGA supporters “don’t even know what they voted for.”

“Donald Trump is doing so many stupidly bad things so badly stupidly that it’s difficult to keep up,” Colbert said at the top of the show. “Anyone who’s ever had a toddler knows this feeling. You leave the room for one second, and when you come back, everything from the bookshelves is on the floor, the walls are covered in ketchup, and when you ask who gave the dog a haircut with safety scissors, your kid says, ‘It was DEI.'”

“It’s hard to know where to start,” he continued. “Each and every one of Trump’s disastrous moves deserves top billing.”

One of the big topics of discussion was Trump’s proposal to put a 25 percent tariff on all imported goods from Canada and Mexico. “He’s only been there two weeks, and he’s already pissing off the neighbors,” the late-night host quipped.

Colbert pointed out how these tariffs could raise the price of goods in the U.S., including fruit and tequila. “Now what are Americans supposed to drink if they want to end the evening in jail?” he joked. “And where is the worm gonna live?” he added before throwing to a photo of RFK Jr. “Oh, sorry, I forgot.”

Turning his attention to Canada, the comedian showed a clip from an NBA game in Toronto over the weekend where the crowd booed “The Star-Spangled Banner.”

“The Canadians are booing us!” Colbert said. “Even worse, then they have to boo us again in French.”

Colbert reminded viewers that Trump campaigned on the promise of tariffs, “but, evidently, no one knew what the hell that meant because recently, Google searches for ‘tariff’ saw a 2,400 percent bump, reaching a 21-year high.”

“They don’t even know what they voted for!” Colbert added before joking, “The next three most popular searches were ‘what my trump hat say?’ ‘is mexico america?’ and ‘can get pregnant in hot tub if keep jeans on?’”

You can watch Colbert’s full opening monologue in the video above and let us know your thoughts in the comments section below.

The Late Show With Stephen Colbert, Weeknights, 11:35/10:35c, CBS

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