‘The Big Bang Theory’: Sheldon Cooper’s Nerdiest Quotes

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The Proton Regeneration
Michael Yarish/CBS
The Collaboration Contamination
Michael Yarish/Warner Bros.

“A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much for a drink. The bartender replies “for you no charge.”

The Solo Oscillation
Michael Yarish/Warner Bros.

“You remember you how you explained to met that the Kardashians aren’t real celebrities. Well, geology is the Kardashians of science.”

The Separation Triangulation
Sonja Flemming/CBS

“My fists are not up here because I’m milking a giant invisible cow!”

The Tenant Disassociation
Michael Yarish/Warner Bros.

“What exactly does that expression mean: ‘friends with benefits?’ Does he provide her with health insurance?”

The Relaxation Integration
Robert Voets/Warner Bros.

“Well, well, well, if it isn’t Wil Wheaton. The Green Goblin to my Spider-Man, the Pope Paul V to my Galileo, the Internet Explorer to my Firefox! “

The Celebration Reverberation
Michael Yarish/Warner Bros.

“Scissors cuts paper. Paper covers rock. Rock crushes lizard. Lizard poisons Spock. Spock smashes scissors. Scissors decapitates lizard. Lizard eats paper. Paper disproves Spock. Spock vaporizes rock. And, as it always has, rock crushes scissors.”

The Matrimonial Metric
Sonja Flemming/CBS

“No, I’m going to ask him to choose between sex and HALO 3. As far as I know, sex has not been upgraded to include high-def graphics and enhanced weapons systems.”

The Monetary Insufficiency
Bill Inoshita/CBS

“Ah, gravity – thou art a heartless b*tch.”

The Bow Tie Asymmetry
Michael Yarish/Warner Bros.

“Interesting. You’re afraid of insects and women. Ladybugs must render you catatonic.”

The Sibling Realignment
Michael Yarish/Warner Bros.

“For the record, it could kill us to meet new people. They could be murderers or the carriers of unusual pathogens. And I’m not insane, my mother had me tested.”

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The Big Bang Theory is coming to an end, which means we’ll be saying goodbye to some of the most beloved sitcom characters on TV.

The hardest one to say farewell to will be Sheldon Cooper (Jim Parsons) and his geeky yet equally funny one-liners. The theoretical physicist might be just as annoying and as he is earnest, but at least he’s always entertaining.

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We’ve collected his nerdiest quotes over the past 12 seasons. Click through the gallery for a laugh!

The Big Bang Theory, Season 12 Premiere, September 24, 8/7c, CBS