Best Lines of the Week (February 11-17): ‘It’s … Not a Rumor’

John Cena in Peacemaker
HBO Max

Another week has rolled by and as always, we have plenty to talk about thanks to the TV characters on our screens.

Resident Alien continues to bring the laughs in its second season, and Abbott Elementary has been cracking us up non-stop. Meanwhile Bel-Air trades in the comedy of Will Smith‘s The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air for its dramatic reimagining on Peacock.  Speaking of drama, we can’t help but put Netflix‘s Inventing Anna on our list as well: We get to see a different side of Julia Garner, and we are all here for it.

Our picks this week helped us sit back and relax so we’re hoping our best lines can do just that. Keep reading to see them!

Alan Tudyk as Harry in Resident Alien
Syfy

Resident Alien (Syfy)

“It is illegal to make them work, so they are just gum stuck to the bottom of your shoe.”

—Harry (Alan Tudyk) continues to hilariously despise children.

Inventing Anna Julia Garner as Anna
Netflix

Inventing Anna (Netflix)

“I work for my success. I earn my accomplishments. Pay attention. Maybe you’ll learn how to be smart like me.”

—Anna (Julia Garner) admires herself as she sits in a jail cell.

Hulu

Pam & Tommy (Hulu)

“Everything he does reflects on you. If he is a train wreck, you are a train wreck by association.”

— Pamela’s (Lily James) publicist, Gail (Mozhan Marnò), advises her to get Tommy (Sebastian Stan) in check when he makes the news after a fight in a bar.

Coman Domingo as Ali Muhammad in Euphoria
HBO

Euphoria (HBO)

“Let Rue be Rue and shower that little one with love. She’s been waiting on it.” 

Ali (Colman Domingo) to Leslie Bennett (Nika King) about Rue (Zendaya) and Gia (Storm Reid)

Janelle James as Ava
ABC

Abbott Elementary (ABC)

Ava: “Does that mean that you’re, like, secretly Mormon?”

Janine: “No…”

Ava: “You should be, ‘cause you need more man! Get it?”

—Principal Ava (Janelle James) cracks a joke at Janine’s (Quinta Brunson) expense when she tells her coworkers that she’s been with her boyfriend since the eighth grade.

 

John Cena in Peacemaker
HBO Max

Peacemaker (HBO Max)

Peacemaker: “Go f**k another fish, asshole.”

Aquaman: “I’m so sick of that rumor.”

The Flash: “It’s… not a rumor.” 

— The Flash (Ezra Miller) doesn’t exactly help Aquaman (Jason Momoa) as Peacemaker (John Cena) reacts to their late arrival.

The Bachelor
ABC

The Bachelor (ABC)

“I’m a grown-ass woman, I know what I have to offer, and I came here to find love.” 

— Mara Agrait is upset and frustrated after Serene Russell comes in and interrupts her moment with Clayton Echard.

 

Jabari Banks as Will Smith in Bel-Air
Peacock

Bel-Air (Peacock)

“Your crown is waiting as soon as you find the courage to wear it.”

—Will Smith’s (Jabari Banks) mother (April Parker Jones) offers encouragement before he leaves his tough neighborhood in Philly for Bel Air.

Suraj Sharma Chris Lowell
Hulu

How I Met Your Father (Hulu)

Sid: “Jesse, this is like a couple’s thing, you know? You’re a lone wolf.”

Jesse: “Cool euphemism for pathetically single.”

—Sid (Suraj Sharma) invites new couple Sophie (Hilary Duff) and Drew (Josh Peck) for a couples’ weekend getaway and Jesse (Chris Lowell) is left out because of his relationship status.

HBO Max

Raised by Wolves (HBO Max)

Mother: “Vita, you’re supposed to be receiving education.”

Vita: “I don’t care about stupid Earth stuff. I want to fight!”

— Vita (Ivy Wong) is playing video games when Mother (Amanda Collin) enters the room and tells her off.