Best Lines of the Week (June 5-11): ‘The Anguish Is Real’

Best TV Quotes June 5 11 Agents of SHIELD Dear Don't
ABC/Mitch Haaseth; Apple TV+; ABC/Guy D’Alema

This week, although we bid farewell to this season of What We Do in the Shadows, we said hello to so many new shows, including Don’tCrossing Swords, and The Bachelor: Greatest Seasons Ever!.

Tears of inspiration were shed after the premiere of Apple TV+’s Dear… as well as during Oprah Winfrey’s OWN Network: Where Do We Go From Here? special.

Tensions are soaring on Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., and on RuPaul’s Drag Race, the comebacks are getting spicier.

Scroll down to see all the quotes that made us laugh and cry this week.

F is For Family Frank Murphy Bill Burr
Netflix

F is for Family (Netflix)

“Why is there always a ‘but’ at the end of you agreeing with me?”

– Frank Murphy (Bill Burr) is comforted by his wife as he talks about his father who, despite his kid’s fondness, he is not the biggest fan of.

Dear Lin Manuel Miranda Apple TV
Apple TV+

Dear... (Apple TV+)

“Every time you make something, you’re throwing rocks in a pond. You have no idea the ripples that are going to come back to you.”

Lin Manuel Miranda, creator of the Broadway hit Hamilton, shares his perspective as part of the new Apple TV+ series that shines a spotlight on legends through readings of letters written by individuals whose lives were changed because of their incredible work.

Crossing Swords King Merriman Luke Evans
Courtesy of Sony

Crossing Swords (Hulu)

“I’m your king, and I demand ribs.” 

– King Merriman (Luke Evans) is consistently comically abusing his power in the new animated Hulu series that pokes fun at the HBO favorite Game of Thrones.

Where Do We Go From Here OWN Network Stacey Abrams
OWN Network

OWN Network: Where Do We Go From Here? (OWN Network)

“The anguish is real, and we should give them space to feel it. What we are grappling with is that these are all confluent happening at the same time… Let’s also not forget that of the 110,000 who have died in this country this year from COVID-19, a disproportionate number are black.”

– Stacey Abrams provides meaningful insight on racial injustice in the United States in Oprah Winfrey’s special discussing the civil unrest going on right now in America after George Floyd’s death.

Adam Scott in ABC's Don't - 'Don't Be a Wiseguy'
ABC/Guy D’Alema

Don't (ABC)

“Tonight, one family has the chance to go home with $100,000, and I have the chance to go home with a new best friend.”

Adam Scott’s introductory line on the first episode of the brand new game show where contestants win money for not doing certain things

Last Week Tonight With John Oliver Andrew Cuomo
HBO/Lloyd Bishop

Last Week Tonight With John Oliver (HBO)

“Having recently said I can’t wait to go back to hating Andrew Cuomo again, I didn’t think the opportunity would come quite this soon.”

John Oliver provides a scathing critique of the New York governor’s response to recent protests.

RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars Jujubee
VH1

RuPaul's Drag Race All Stars (VH1)

“Mariah Paris Balenciaga — great, you’re here so now we have to change the name to ‘Rupaul’s Drag Race: SOME Stars’.” 

Jujubee gets her fellow contestant with a clever zinger for the “reading” challenge in the season premiere.

The Bachelor Greatest Seasons Ever Sean Lowe Catherine Lowe
ABC

The Bachelor: The Greatest Seasons - Ever! (ABC)

“I realized that when I would go back to my hotel room at night, Catherine was the one that would continue to pop into my head, who I continued to think, ‘Oh, wow, I really could see myself starting a family and getting married to this woman… Wait a minute, I am falling in love with Catherine.’”

– Sean Lowe dishes on how he realized Catherine was the one on his season of The Bachelor on the first episode of this summer’s special highlighting some of the best moments on the show.

Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. - Clark Gregg as Coulson - 'The New Deal'
ABC/Mitch Haaseth

Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (ABC)

“OK miss, just go with me on this. I’ve always wanted to try it. You’re walking in the desert and you see a turtle. You pick it up, and flip it over on it’s back. Now that sucker’s roasting in the sun. That poor, innocent turtle just trying to turn itself over, but it can’t. Not without your help. But you’re not helping. Why?!”

— Agent Phil Coulson (Clark Gregg) upsets a human bus passenger in the 1950s while trying to root out the emotionless Chronicoms by using the Blade Runner Voight-Kampff test.

What We Do In the Shadows Season Finale
FX

What We Do In The Shadows (FX)

“I don’t care what the f**k your name is, we had to pick up our own laundry!”

— Vampire Nandor (Kayvan Novak) to his former familiar Guillermo (Harvey Guillén) when he finally returns and tells them his last name in the season ender