Samantha: “I haven’t heard FOX News be this anti-law enforcement since they had to grapple with The Mysteries of Laura. A lady cop? The city can’t afford to paint all those guns pink!” – Samantha Bee throws insults at Fox News over recent political happenings.
Celebrity Big Brother
Ross: “When people ask me who you don’t want to see in the house, my answer was Omarosa. I can’t do toxicity and negativity. Oh my, Omarosa.” – Ross Matthews reacts to Omarosa walking into the Big Brother house.
Olivia: “You made Jake your Chief of Staff. Please tell me, after everything, you are not this stupid and naïve and foolish. But most of all stupid.” – Olivia Pope (Kerry Washington) is less-than-pleased when she confronts Mellie (Bellamy Young) over her selection of new Chief of Staff.
Buck: “Be cool, you’re not choking in front of her.” – Buck’s (Oliver Stark) nerves get the best of him on a date with Abby (Connie Britton).
I Am Jazz
Jazz: “So, is this a soul mate or a sexual mate? Have you differentiated?” ‘Grandma, do I look like a sexual being?’” – Jazz Jennings is less than inclined to answer a sexual related question from her grandma, Jackie.
This Is Us
Rebecca: “I have to go in and I have to talk to my kids and I have to ruin the rest of their life. So I’m gonna be strong for them. God help me, I’m gonna be strong for them, and if you can’t be strong for them either, then you need to take a walk around the block until you can.” – Rebecca (Mandy Moore) to Miguel (Jon Huertas) when she reveals that Jack (Milo Ventimiglia) died of a heart attack.
Nomi: “But we’d have to bring our own alcohol.” Jazz: “Nope. Not worth it.” – After their ladies night was ruined by a blackout, Nomi (Emily Arlook) suggests going to a party across campus, but Jazz (Chloe Bailey) shoots the idea down.
Katie: “As long as a woman feels good inside of her own skin and loves her body, there’s nothing more beautiful than that.” – Katie Maloney comments on the importance of body-confidence and self-love after Kevin Lee made a remark about her weight gain.
Martha: “You must feel pretty betrayed. Do you want me to help you trash the place?” – After Chip’s (Zach Galifianakis) friends decline his invitation to be the new key clowns in the rodeo, Martha (Martha Kelly) attempts to make him feel better.
Scott Everett White/The CW
Rebecca: “After we had sex that one time, we only had sex like three more times that week. And then we stopped. Except for last night, and this morning. But I don’t count this morning, because the janitor opened the door of the supply closet, so nobody finished. Except I’m pretty sure the janitor.” – Rebecca Bunch (Rachel Bloom) explains her current romantic situation with Nathaniel to Dr. Akopian (Michael Hyatt) now that the two of them share an office.