Best Lines of the Week (Jan. 26-Feb. 1): ‘They Want My F**king Dog?!’

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Best Lines
Grown-ish - YARA SHAHIDI, best lines
Eric McCandless/FreeForm


Zoey: “A pinga is a penis, isn’t it?”
Ana: “You’re damn right it is.”
— Zoey (Yara Shahidi) learns a new word after sharing with roomie Ana (Francia Raisa) that she had sex for the first time.

America's Next Top Model - B. Akerlund, best lines

America’s Next Top Model

B. Akerlund: “Welcome to my world of horror. Today’s about torture and pain, and none of my clothes are comfortable. So, enjoy the nightmare.”
— Fashion activist and costume designer B. Akerlund discusses the models’ photo shoot challenge.

Grey's Anatomy

Grey’s Anatomy

Bailey: “My name is Dr. Miranda Bailey. I am Chief of Surgery at Grey-Sloan Memorial, and I believe I am having a heart attack.”
— While used to being in charge of the patients, Bailey (Chandra Wilson) becomes a patient herself when she checks into another hospital in fear for her health.

Drunk History - Derek Waters, best lines
Comedy Central

Drunk History

Chris: ““Like I don’t want to accidentally do crystal meth. I don’t want to accidentally do that.”
— Chris Romano explains to host Derek Waters the possible repercussions of knowing someone with a dangerous mind like Rasputin.



Fiona: “My dog, Rusty? They want my f**king dog?”
— Fiona (Emmy Rossum) is less than pleased to hear that the family suing her also wants ownership of her dog.

Kevin Can Wait

Kevin Can Wait

Kevin: “I meet this great girl and now I gotta pretend to be married to you, with an angry colon?”
— Kevin (Kevin James) isn’t pleased with the lie his business partner (Leah Remini) told the flight attendant in order to get them first class seats.

Law & Order: Special Victims Unit

Law and Order: SVU

Olivia: “Martha you didn’t ask for this. You are under so much pressure, you don’t realize that this is not your fault. So tell me who did this to you.”
— Lieutenant Olivia Benson (Mariska Hargitay) desperately tries to convince a sexual assault victim not to blame herself and explain what happened in an intense conversation.

best lines, THE 60TH ANNUAL GRAMMY AWARDS - Alessia Cara
ohn P. Filo/CBS

60th Grammy Awards

Alessia: “I’ve been pretend-winning Grammys since I was a kid in my shower… You are the reason I don’t have to win Grammys in my shower anymore.”
— Canadian singer-songwriter Alessia Cara celebrates making her dream a reality and thanking her fans while accepting the Grammy for Best New Artist.

Vanderpump Rules - Tom Schwartz, Best lines
Tommy Garcia/Bravo

Vanderpump Rules

Tom: “Scheana, you’re fake from head to toe. You have no personality. You’re nothing. You’re a bootleg Kardashian. All you care about is a f**king selfie.”
— Tom Schwartz calls Scheana Marie out for being fake while defending his wife Katie Maloney at coworker, Peter’s, birthday party

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend - Rachel Bloom, best lines
Michael Yarish/The CW

Crazy Ex-Girlfriend

Rebecca: “Oh no, I didn’t dump him. I just put us on an indefinite permanent break.”
— Rebecca (Rachel Bloom) downplays her situation with Nathaniel (Scott Michael Foster) as she announces she is ready to return to working at the law firm.

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From the Grammy Awards to Grey’s Anatomy, this week was filled with memorable quotes from television’s favorite characters bringing viewers humor, sass, and emotion-filled entertainment.

Click through the gallery above for our 10 favorite lines of the week!

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