’90 Day Fiancé’ Finale: Let’s See How Long This Lasts (RECAP)

Jasmin + Blake TLC 90 Day Fiancé
Spoiler Alert
TLC

[Warning: The below contains MAJOR spoilers for 90 Day Fiancé Season 7, Episode 13].

It’s the long-awaited Season 7 finale, where we find out which couples tie the knot and which seem to be splitting at the seams.

Oh, and apparently 2019 was a year for red-themed nuptials (seriously the Game of Thrones fandom has gone too far) which is a trend we hope dies as quickly as Mike and Natalie’s relationship. Check out our top moments from the episode!

Buzz Off Already

The always-crying Anna goes to pick up her beekeeping partner Mursel from the airport with two of her sons in tow. The eldest, Joey, is actively boycotting the wedding which seems to be more and more like a smart decision.

Anna-Marie Campisi TLC 90 Day Fiancé

Once Mursel arrives in the U.S. from Turkey, they only have six hours to wed. “Oh my god, we’ve got so much to do,” Anna says while in transit, calling caterers in hopes to schedule her nuptials for the same evening. We feel bad for Anna but at some point she just does this to herself.

#SoulmateGate

Syngin rightfully continues to have second thoughts after Tania told him that she doesn’t have “that soulmate feeling” with him. Welcome to the rest of the world, Tania. “I don’t even know what I’m doing here right now,” Syngin confesses, to which Tania apologizes. Can we just move past #SoulmateGate already?

Tania + Syngin TLC 90 Day Fiancé

Also we officially found Tania’s Pantone color of the year.

A Wedding Because… Why Not?

So Jasmin and Blake get married. WHY?!

Jasmin + Blake TLC 90 Day Fiancé

“I know in traditional weddings I’m not supposed to see you, but I’m sure we’ll be fine,” Blake tells Jasmin while getting ready. Yeah, that’s probably what’s going to break up this marriage, not at all the fact that they have nothing in common.

FaceTime From Hell

After returning from the Ukraine, Mike is still uneasy about the status of his relationship with Natalie. They haven’t spoken in a week until Mike calls her on FaceTime. While Mike wants to discuss their argument, Natalie boasts that she hasn’t even thought of it since he left.

“Do you love me or what?” Mike bluntly asks, to which Natalie just repeats everything he says for the next few minutes: “you cut me deep” followed by “no, you cut me deep!” Real mature, Natalie, real mature.

Mike Youngquist TLC 90 Day Fiancé

“I had my rights to behave the way I did but I did nothing wrong towards you,” Natalie says. “You need to be stronger.” She’s the one who threw her ring at him, and this is how she responds?!

Natalie then admits she doesn’t trust Mike, and a producer asks him to explain if something happened off-camera. Mike doesn’t really answer which makes us wonder if he actually is hiding something, or if Natalie is just grasping at reasons to break up.

We’ve Witnessed Enough

Angela and Michael meet with the wedding registrar of Nigeria who tells them that he recommends an American witness for ceremony to boost the likelihood of being granted a spousal visa. Angela apparently makes up her mind right there in his office that she will wed Michael in Nigeria and give up her dreams of having her family attend their wedding.

Angela + Michael TLC 90 Day Fiancé

However, without someone from Angela’s side in attendance, the registrar threatens that the marriage might be deemed invalid.

“The compromise me and Michael came to was plan the wedding here in Nigeria but if the letter comes with good news from our lawyer, the Nigerian wedding’s off and we’re getting married in America,” Angela announces. Sounds like a plan, sealed with a fist bump.

Angela leaves Lagos and flies back to the U.S. without marrying Michael.

Just Don’t Ask

A week after marrying Juliana, Michael is still in a blissful newlywed state. He drops off his two kids with ex-wife Sarah, who asks about their Halloween. Juliana apparently dressed up as a zombie, “but kind of hot,” Michael tells his ex-wife about his new, younger wife in front of their children. “She was offered a lot of tricks.” Then they all comfortably laugh about prostitution and sexy stepmoms.

There’s a “hey, remember our wedding?” conversation about rain and weather and good omens (apparently they’re forgetting the fact that they’re divorced), and Sarah finally asks about the prenup with Juliana. Michael confesses he, in fact, did not go through with one, and Sarah says she trusts him to do the best thing for the children.

Pour Some Honey on Me

Anna is freaking out about how to prepare for the wedding with guests arriving in only one hour. Of course fast-thinker Mursel is no help as Anna tries to show him how to steam his own suit. Mursel is sad his family isn’t there but need we remind him, his family is why he and Anna are having a somehow-worse wedding than originally planned.

Anna + Mursel TLC 90 Day Fiancé

Mursel ties a red ribbon around Anna as per Turkish tradition, and he starts crying as soon as he sees her in her wedding gown. The happy-for-now couple walk hand-in-hand up to the altar to exchange vows.

Anna’s youngest son gives an adorably passive aggressive speech about how he will now “live with that” aka Mursel being his stepdad.

“Me. Here. Finish,” Mursel eloquently sums up the evening.

“With This Tattoo, I Thee Wed”

It’s Tania and Syngin’s wedding day, and Syngin says that hopefully he isn’t the one to break his family’s 500-year divorce-free streak. The couple are having a fully DIY wedding in the backyard of an Airbnb. Neither of them have written vows or started on the food for guests. “F*** DIY wedding,” Syngin jokes. But seriously.

Guests start arriving while Tania is wearing sweats and putting ice in coolers for reception beers. “I guess I’m just going to bird bath it,” Tania says about her hygiene prior to the “I do’s.”

Tania + Syngin TLC 90 Day Fiance

Syngin still hasn’t “figured out if our future aligns,” but regardless the couple still walk down the aisle. Tania opts for a black lace dress over a pink satin slip, and while it’s not traditional, she looks stunning. Syngin starts crying up as soon as he sees his bride, and Tania joins him in tears when he gets down on one knee to explain how much he loves her during their vows.

In lieu of rings, the newlyweds decide to receive tattoos on their fingers. Yikes. “We decided on Sagittarius because it’s the travel sign and it just felt super important to us,” Tania explains. Ok sure. There’s also smoke and creepy candelabras, so maybe the bewitching theme was intentional by Tania since she’s a self-proclaimed “witch doctor.”

Endless Love

Robert and Anny individually prepare for their big day. Even though Robert has five children, he’s never been married and says that he hopes to only have one wife for the rest of his life.

During the ceremony, though, Robert interrupts, saying that he “can’t do this right now.” Surprise, it’s finally an engagement ring for Anny! “I love you until the day I leave this earth,” Robert promises. Anny gets emotional and says “I do” through tears of happiness.

Anny + Robert TLC 90 Day Fiancé

They joke about having another five kids together so Robert can have a “full NBA team” worth of children. Through the multiple weddings this finale episode, it seems like Anny and Robert are among the top to succeed. Well, at least fare better than Blake and Jasmin, that’s for sure.

Previews

The beginning of the two-part Tell All kicks off next week and promises plenty of drama. While it seems from online postings that Angela and Michael are married, Angela continues her streak of walking off  Tell All sets, this time screaming at Michael “kiss this white, trashy ass.” Robert confronts Bryson’s grandparents in a heated argument that reveals why they haven’t seen Bryson in months. And ugh, #SoulmateGate is apparently still a thing as other cast members scold Tania.

The most revealing teaser though is that Mike may have cheated on Natalie. Maybe we need to ask Bojangles? Plus, Sarah, Michael’s ex-wife, implies that infidelity was the reason for their divorce. Let’s see how Juliana responds to that.

But let’s be honest, we all just want to see more of Sasha’s tirades about refusing to eat cereal. Now that would be a real Tell All.

Until next week 90 Day lovers!

90 Day Fiancé, Sundays, 8/7c, TLC