What to Do If You Didn't Get a San Diego Comic-Con Badge

Oriana Schwindt
Clockwise from top left: Matthias Clamer/FX; Adrian Rogers/BBC; Frank Ockenfels 3/AMC (2)

You did your damndest. You had already registered for a Member ID. You made sure you were in the registration "waiting room" well ahead of registration time. And still, you didn't get a San Diego Comic-Con badge. Shhh. Come here. It'll be all right. Did you really want to sleep on a sidewalk to sit through half a day's worth of panels in which you have no interest, in the company of some folks who are as in need of a shower as you are, just to get a glimpse of Benedict Cumberbatch from 200 feet away? No, you didn't. But in case you're still feeling a little left out, here are a few TV-related ideas on how to spend your days outside of San Diego.

Thursday, July 9

What you're missing: Doctor Who (2 pm, Hall H)
What to do: Steven Moffat isn't going to suddenly start handing out spoilers, and you weren't going to get into Hall H anyway. Turn off your WiFi, take a blurry photo of your Twelve cardboard standee with your phone, and attempt to post to Twitter, howling in frustration when your battery dies after the fifteenth try. Then plug your phone in, turn your WiFi back on, and watch some NSFW Malcolm Tucker/Doctor Who mash-ups from the comfort of your couch. Fish sticks and custard optional.

Friday, July 10

What you're missing: Fear the Walking Dead/The Walking Dead (12 pm, Hall H)
What to do: Get some of those zombie masks you've had in your closet from Halloween and pop them onto broomsticks, arranging them in a ring around you. Take the roll of wrapping paper you also found in the closet and decapitate the broomsticks with an almost preternatural grace. To replace the unflagging enthusiasm of panel moderator Chris Hardwick, go to the pound and play with some puppies. Name one Carl. Attempt to place a teeny Sheriff's hat on its adorable head.

Saturday, July 11

What you're missing: Hannibal (5 pm, Ballroom 20)
What to do: Put on your finest flower crown and your official Hannibal apron. Invite your dearest friends over for dinner, then serve them a true Italian feast, starting with the apertivo and ending with the digestivo. Try your hand at risotto alla milanese or homemade gnocchi. (Note: TV Insider does not recommend or condone the killing and eating of guests.)

Sunday, July 12

What you're missing: The FX Fearless Arena (runs Thursday, July 9 through Sunday, July 12)
What to do: This sounds like a pretty interesting idea, actually—a sort of mini-amusement park dedicated to FX shows. For The Strain, there's a virtual reality game; for Fargo, a giant inflatable snow globe, etc. That doesn't mean it's an inimitable experience: Talk to your roommates in an exaggerated Minnesota accent until they ask if you've had a stroke. Head to the diviest Irish pub in town and provoke the bartenders into verbally abusing you. Have yourself a Sunday Funday with three of your besties Worsties.