9 Worst Food Network Shows, Ranked

Cake Boss star Buddy Volastro and his family hit the road in an RV for this reality show, in which they sought “fantastic food and family adventures” while Volastro and his wife came up with “brilliant rules of the road guaranteed to keep any family road trip on track.” We don’t need a family travelogue; let us eat Cake!

We often imagine reality TV show premises as the results of a grab bag of words, as if producers are just filling in blanks in Mad Libs. Take the case of Kitchen Casino, a culinary competition involving casino-themed challenges. We’re all for TV producers going for broke, but they should have known this one would be a bad bet.

We’re just as awed as anyone else by artists who create masterpieces on a minuscule scale. But we do not think a reality competition about tiny food should have warranted a green light from Food Network. Perhaps the network’s execs came to the same realization, considering the show only had a tiny six-episode run.

You know Food Network is scraping the bottom of the barrel when it resorts to challenges of sleep-deprived endurance. In this torturous reality show, chefs have to make it through 24 hours of culinary competitions to win a cash prize. All the while, we’re wondering if these exhausted contestants should really be using knives…

Here’s television at its most stomach-turning. We really don’t need to turn on our TV sets to watch a restaurant consultant scope out unsanitary conditions in restaurants ahead of health inspectors’ visits. (And on that note, is this also the television show with the most unimaginative, least intriguing title? Couldn’t Food Network have spiced it up a little?)

Food Network tried to cash in on The Biggest Loser’s popularity — and even recruited a former Biggest Loser trainer — as it followed a dozen culinary professionals who, in the network’s words, wanted to “defeat their abusive relationship with food.” Yep, this is just another body-negative, lowbrow reality show — and one with a derisive-sounding title, to boot.

Robert Irvine got to host this restaurant-resuscitating reality show after the St. Petersburg Times pointed out inaccuracies in the restaurateur’s resumé, which included his claims of being a knight, a friend of then-Prince Charles, and a former White House chef. Apparently, those fibs weren’t dealbreakers for Food Network!

This reality show, which uses hidden cameras to expose problems at restaurants, might be entertaining if it weren’t, according to one report, totally staged. In 2012, a restaurant owner revealed that Stakeout’s production team hired an actor to amp up the drama, told the real employees what to do on camera, and fudged the timeline of the show, per Reality Blurred.

Critics who bemoan the reality-fication of Food Network need to look no further than this competition, in which self-avowed bad cooks subject themselves to national humiliation for the shot at a cash prize. Good on them for having a sense of humor about their culinary cluelessness, but Food Network used to be aspirational — and, for that matter, appetizing!