Best Lines on TV This Week (September 8-14): 'So You Banged Papa Smurf'

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Teen Wolf - Gideon Emory
MTV

Teen Wolf

Deucalion: “You’ll always be an outsider because of your abilities. Gerard wasn’t the first to capitalize on the general publics’ fear of ‘the other,’ and he won’t be the last.”

– Deucalion (Gideon Emery) returns to Teen Wolf to deliver some advice to Scott McCall (Tyler Posey) about the war being led by Gerard Argent (Michael Hogan) against the supernatural creatures of the world. One can’t help to think the line is meant to also be political.

Outlander
Starz

Outlander

Nurse: “What a beautiful little angel. How’d she get the red hair?”

– A nurse to Claire (Caitriona Balfe) and Frank (Tobias Menzies) after the birth of Brianna, Jamie’s (Sam Heughan) rightful daughter.

THE ORVILLE - Seth MacFarlane, Penny Johnson Jerald, Adrianne Palicki, Halston Sage and Brian George; THE ORVILLE: L-R: Seth MacFarlane, Penny Johnson Jerald, Adrianne Palicki, Halston Sage and guest star Brian George in THE ORVILLE premiering this fall on FOX. ©2017 Fox Broadcasting Co.
FOX

The Orville

Mercer: “So you banged Papa Smurf. In our bed. That’s one way to handle it.”

– Ed Mercer (Seth MacFarlane) returns home in the year 2418 to find his wife Grayson (Adrianne Palicki) in bed with her blue alien lover.

Halt and Catch Fire - Lee Pace
Tina Rowden/AMC

Halt and Catch Fire

Joe: “Our whole approach, the human touch, it’s now completely and totally…

– Joe MacMillan (Lee Pace) speaks as the end credits cut him off, responding to the fact that Donna’s Rover teams cracked a difficult coding problem. This is bad news for Joe and Gordon’s (Scoot McNairy) website, though, because it puts their business at risk.

Fear the Walking Dead - Colman Domingo
Richard Foreman, Jr/AMC

Fear the Walking Dead

Strand: “My mother named me Victor, because she knew I’d always win.”

– Strand (Colman Domingo) gave a small peek into his past after getting himself into trouble, only to emerge as a survivor once again.

Broad City - Ilana Glazer, Abbi Jacobsom
Comedy Central

Broad City

Ilana: “We are so not dying today!”
Abbi: “So not! I mean, what, are we gonna listen to her? She was eating a burrito bowl.”

-Ilana (Glazer) and Abbi (Jacobson) examine the day they first met, and what it would’ve been like had they not ended up spending it together, including a visit to a psychic with an interesting premonition.

BACHELOR IN PARADISE - KRISTINA SCHULMAN, JAIMI KING, DIGGY MORELAND, DANIELLE MALTBY, DOMINIQUE ALEXIS, DEAN UNGLERT, HALEY FERGUSON, CHRISTEN WHITNEY
Paul Hebert/ABC

Bachelor in Paradise

Danielle: “If you’re still in a place where you don’t know exactly what you want, you’ve got to figure it out on your own.”

– On the season finale, contestant Danielle Maltby responds after Dean Unglert tells her he was really in love with Kristina Schulman after having spent time with both girls in paradise. Sadly, he left the island with neither.

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