14 Best Klaus Hargreeves Lines on ‘The Umbrella Academy’ (PHOTOS)

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The Umbrella Academy
Klaus 1

“I can’t just call Dad in the afterlife and be like, ‘Dad, could you just stop playing tennis with Hitler for a moment and take a quick call?'”

Klaus had a plethora of insults ready for Sir Reginald Hargreeves’ funeral, and he put every one to good use.

Klaus 2

“I don’t know about you, but I could really use a drink.” *knocks over urn*

Klaus was definitely justified in needing a drink after everything that happened that day. His reaction to spilling his father’s ashes was one of the best moments of the first episode.

Klaus 3

Klaus: “Drop dead.”
Ben: “Low blow!”

We love Klaus’ conversations with his late brother, Ben (whom he could still see because of his powers). However, that particular insult hit a little too close to home.

Klaus 4

Five: “I thought I told you to put on something professional.”
Klaus: “This is my nicest outfit!”

Klaus looked great, Five. What was the problem with his nicest outfit?

Klaus 5

“I’m with Diego, because screw you.”

Much of the fandom agrees with Klaus re: Luther’s character.

Klaus 6

“Hey, did I ever tell you guys about the time I waxed my a** with chocolate pudding?”

Not the most appropriate comment for Klaus to add when his siblings were discussing the apocalypse and questioning his usefulness, but hey, it certainly was hilarious.

Klaus 7

“I’d like to apologize… that you are depriving some village of their idiot!”

Klaus wasn’t feeling too apologetic when one of the vets at the VFD loudly questioned his military history. Come on, let Klaus grieve the loss of his boyfriend in peace!

Klaus 8

Diego: “I told you to wait in the car.”
Klaus: “Yeah, but you also told me licking a nine-volt battery would give me pubes.”

Clearly, 8-year-old Diego couldn’t be trusted.

Klaus 9

“I need to pee.”

The look on Diego’s face when Klaus told him — after he’d spent a ton of time tying Klaus up so he could use his powers — that he needed a bathroom break? Priceless.

Klaus 10

“Maybe they’ll brood each other to death.”

Klaus has little patience for Diego and Luther’s power struggle.

Klaus 11

“Then again, a little exercise couldn’t hurt.”

When threatened with one of Diego’s knives in a sensitive area, Klaus changed his tune about going on a mission.

Klaus 12

Diego: “Who the hell are these guys?”

Klaus: “Maybe they’re here for Kenny’s birthday!”

The masked people shooting at them in the bowling alley were, in fact, not there for Kenny’s birthday party.

Klaus 13

“OK, well, sorry. I’m just gonna go murder mom really quick. I’ll be right back.”

No one handled Luther’s implication that one of the siblings murdered their father well, but Klaus responded with a bit of dry humor.

Klaus 14

Five: “Get up. We’re going [to save the world.]”

Klaus: “Oh, is that all?”

No big deal, just going to prevent the impending apocalypse.

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[Warning: This gallery contains spoilers for the first season of The Umbrella Academy.]

If you’ve been on the internet at all since February 15, you’ve probably at least seen a mention — or a couple dozen mentions — of Klaus Hargreeves (Robert Sheehan).

A fan favorite from The Umbrella Academy‘s first season, Klaus has it all: perfect comedic timing, incredible fashion sense, a heartbreaking love story, a desert-dry wit, and the power to communicate with the dead. Is it any wonder Twitter is obsessed with him?

Click through the gallery above to discover (or re-live) some of Klaus’ best moments from the show’s first season.

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